[Shadow-world]

I've sometimes wondered in the past what exactly people meant when they reminded me to be good to myself after having been particularly down, angry, hopeless or desperate.
I think I start to understand it. Although it sounds self-indulgent or selfish to start with, I can now see that taking care of oneself is the necessary basis to wellbeing and the possibility of reaching out to others and being good to them.

Last night I was in a weepy, exhausted and anxious mood (the nights drawing in earlier don't help) and I made myself go to a gentle group exercise session to be out of the house for a while. One of the people in the class who I sometimes speak to was a bit surprised that I apparently looked so shattered and exhausted (I'd cried a bit during the class, too) and laughed - not in a malicious way, but she didn't know or understand.
I then decided that I shouldn't care about other people's reactions. If you stop measuring yourself by other people's standards and expectations, you won't constantly fall short. Instead, I decided to focus on what I have achieved.
A month ago, I was contemplating ending it all and had no hope whatsoever. Now this has improved and I decide to hold on to this and just accept to give myself a lot of rest when I need it no matter how super-active and efficient some other people are. It's not laziness... .
I always used to push myself and then got into such states.

I believe being good to oneself involves taking time to rest, to acknowledge one's feelings, to allow vulnerability and to be okay with it.
I think I start to understand this.

[Leed]

You are absolutely right. If we don't take care of ourselves, no one else will -- that's for sure.

Like you said, we can't care what other people think -- they're going to talk regardless of what we do!! Our "way" may not be what THEY would do, but who cares? As long as it works for us, that's all that matters.

So pampering ourselves can be a good thing -- no selfishness there.

I wish you the very best -- God bless. Hugs, Lee

[agma]

Thanks for the post.....this is something that I really struggle with. The part that I am struggling the most with right now is how to be okay with acknowledging one's feelings and allowing vulnerability.

[Astridetal]

I struggle with this too. Thanks for sharing. It's so good.

[Gus1234U]

what a major step towards self acceptance, ShadowWorld. i dare say that if you can hold on to that insight and implement it, no hardship can destroy you, no event can derail you, nothing can hold you back from a progressive inner peace and acceptance of others. well done~! congrats~! best wishes, Gus

[Fuzzybear]

Thanks so much for sharing, Shadow-world
I struggle with this too...