[lostinfantasies]

I finally plucked up some courage to go and get some help, and for the past few weeks I've been seeing a doctor regularly. It's been helpful, I think -- I was seeing her every week and then it had been changed to two weeks, and then a month. My next appointment's in a few weeks, so I'm obviously looking forward to that (*sigh*).

The thing is...I'm almost eighteen. Which means I've had something of this sort for almost...seven, eight years. I've spent my entire teenage life like this. This is literally who I am - I'm this depressed, paranoid person. And if I continue to go to the doctor's, and if I try and rid myself of this depression, then who am I going to be after that?

What happens after?

Do I just...live? Survive? Try and forge a completely new personality? Or am I just going to be this person, stripped of everything that defined her these past few years (for almost a *decade*), and just a shell of what she once was, albeit in an apparently positive way?

[LCRose]

Although I'm a lot older than you, I can hear you completely. You sound just like me at that age. We take refuge in our depression; we adopt it; we define ourselves by it. The truth is, we are inside of that depression. It is not us. We are submerged in it like a pearl in an oyster. It is true that depression has shaped us like any experience in our lives, but we are separate from it. We can shine without it in a way that our submerged self can only begin to imagine.

[EJ711]

Dear Lost -

What a thought provoking post!

I think investing the time and money to go to therapy at your age is a wonderful idea-- one that will benefit you for a lifetime.

May I ask if losses of some kind or another have contributed to your depression?

My opinion is that therapy will allow you to look objectively at yourself and events in your life that have helped shape who you are today. I think therapy also helps you to have your own built-in supervisor, as in, you will learn how to keep an eye on your emotions. This will allow you to address problems in their early stages, and understand why you react to certain people and behaviors the way you do.

I think therapy makes people stronger and confident. Besides people who have gone to therapy know themselves better than the average person.

I think through therapy you will only discard those parts of you, which are no longer needed to forge a great and wonderful life for yourself.

Congratulations on making this life-changing decision. Feel free to PM me if you like.

Hugs,

EJ

[pegasus]

lostinfantasies,

I am glad that you have started to get some help.

With the right help, it is possible to live with depression and come out the other side but it can take a long time.

After seeing the doctor for a while, he will probably refer you for counselling or therapy.

You WILL get to a point where you are not just enduring life. There is a light at the end of the tunnel!

Hugs.

the therapist is not going to just say ok you're done goodbye the day you turn 18. Therapy doesnt work according to the clients age. But depending on the type of therapist you may be transferred to a therapist that works with adults instead of a therapist that works with children.

Who will you be when you turn 18 - the same biological you that you are right now. The only difference is going to be instead of using all those coping tools you have learned throughout your childhood therapy program you will use as an adult be it if you choose to get a job, go to college, get your own appartment, vehicle and so on that other adults do.

Basically all that is going to change on your 18th birthday is that you will legally and morally be considered an adult instead of a child.

There may be times when you need a therapist and there may not be but now that you will be an adult YOU will be making the therapy decisions of who you see and how often or if you rather not at all. As an adult all desicions are now up to you hey WOW you have a whole world that you can now explore and learn what you like and don't like, what you want to do and what you don't want to do. Just like any other adult in this world 18 years or older no one can force you into therapy or any thing else you want or don't want to do as long as you are not hurting yourself and other people, and are following the legal laws of your state, country. time to celebrate you are going to be an adult. It will take some time but as you explore you will know what your likes and dislikes are and what you want to do.

{{{{{ lostinfantasies }}}}}

Michaelangelo's 'David' was already there, buried in the marble quarry under the weight of heavy grey stone.

It was removing the excess that caused the finished product to emerge, revealing a masterpiece that transcends the ages.

Therapy is where the sculpting takes place.

Petunia

[Lexicon78]

You are evolving, as we all are. You were somebody else a decade ago than you are now. In a decade you will evolve into someone else. We never stop shaping and evolving ourselves. Change is inevitable.