I'm tired of trying, trying, trying & I still keep going lower and lower. I hate this

Ive been trying pretty hard the past couple weeks to keep myself from slipping further down. It doesn't see to be working. I'm honestly starting to feel like death is gonna be my fate
I'm no suicidal but idk....I'm having one hell of a time, lemmie tell ya.
I just got out of the hospital, I was in the psych ward there for a week. I started getting ect tx. Wasn't helping untill this last treatment, still depressed as ever but ever since yesterday's treatment Im having memory problems now. Uhhhh NOtHING is working out for me. Now I can't remember important dates and other stuff.
No medicine has worked, therapy-I mean it feels good to talk but I'm not sure how much that's helping and even ECT isn't helping!!!!
My unemployment ran out. I'm gonna try and apply for disability to get some income coming in. But dr.s orders are I can't drive while getting ECt, so my dad physically took my keys.
Stuck at my house with my kids, no car, no cable, depressed as ever. LOVEEEE my life :/.

I hvnt been this depressed in a long time. Even a while ago when I was really depressed, I wasn't THIS down. I hate how nothing is working! Not even the most extreme treatments

I don't know what to do anymore. I hate feeling like this. I wish I could have the power to feel better again. I'd even take 10% better...

Wow. I so wish your heroic efforts would be crowned with some sort of success, but the enemy you are fighting is depression.

Personally, I see you entirely justified in seeking and applying for any and all types of assistance. I hope you won't be alone in this struggle.

so dad will pitch in and help?

I'm hoping something miraculous leaps out.
Roadie

No. Only help dad gave was take my car keys :/

Idk what's gonna happen

oh, sweetie. so sorry you're having a rough time. I wish I could help! for what it's worth, I'm saying some prayers for you. hang in there!