[mishelle]

This is the first time that I am doing something like this. I'm very shy and it's hard for me to talk to people so I was hoping that being on an online community would help, and so far it seems to be okay.
I have been dealing with depression since I was 12, so for seven years I've been dealing with it. It's become a lot more manageable, but its still hard for the most part. I go to college full time and its been...hard. But I've been dealing with it. I'm not exactly sure what I'm expecting from joining, but at this point, I'm willing to accept any help I can get.
Thank you for reading!

[regretful]

This is a supportive place, and I think you can learn a lot about how other people manage their depression. Do you have to be in school full-time if it is, as you say, hard? Also, your college campus likely has a counseling center. If you have not already done so, look them up and see if there is someone there that can be of assistance. Glad you're here. Best wishes.

[Puffyprue]

Hello welcome the site

I hope you make many friends here

[mishelle]

Originally Posted by regretful

This is a supportive place, and I think you can learn a lot about how other people manage their depression. Do you have to be in school full-time if it is, as you say, hard? Also, your college campus likely has a counseling center. If you have not already done so, look them up and see if there is someone there that can be of assistance. Glad you're here. Best wishes.

My parents wouldn't be understanding if I decided to not take the full amount of credits. My dad doesn't know about my depression, or any problems I have and I haven't explained it to him because I know he wouldn't understand. I do go to the counseling center and I have a T that I go to, but its hard during the summer months...I was hoping I would have a better hold of it but it seems as if I don't.

[regretful]

I'm sure it is difficult in the summer without the structure of classes and schedules. Is medication an option for you? If you have been wrestling with depression for 7 years, maybe it's time to consider that as an option.

I'm sure you know your dad better than anyone, but are you sure he wouldn't understand? Depression is an illness, and it is real. Maybe he would "get it" if you told him. If your mom is an advocate for you, maybe she can serve as an intermediary so you can get your point across...

There might be some other things that you can do during the summer to keep yourself occupied to address the depressive feelings. If you are studying something in school that interests you, get that supplemental reading list out and get one of the suggested books. I know that I never read any of those suggested books until graduate school was over...

Best wishes to you.

Originally Posted by mishelle

My parents wouldn't be understanding if I decided to not take the full amount of credits. My dad doesn't know about my depression, or any problems I have and I haven't explained it to him because I know he wouldn't understand. I do go to the counseling center and I have a T that I go to, but its hard during the summer months...I was hoping I would have a better hold of it but it seems as if I don't.

[whimsygirl]

Hello and welcome mishelle....Glad you're here! Depression is such a challenging thing to deal with, and the more support you can get ~feel the better. Just to realize that you are sooo not alone can be a blessing at times. Good to hear that you're seeing a therapist....I hope they are kind and supportive. I know at certain times during my college days I was seeing various therapists through the school, and I'm not sure what I would have done if not for them. (I pretty much fell into the "starving student" category, and could not have afforded a private therapist.) One other thing....regarding whether or not your Dad would understand about the depression, and partly echoing what regretful has already said....you can never be sure how someone may respond if you don't disclose what you are dealing with. And if he does not understand....and I know, sadly, many people do not, what will you have lost by telling him? This is an illness that you suffer from. It is not your choice, or your fault, and it sounds like you are taking positive steps to help yourself. Personally, as someone who has done battle with this illness since childhood, I believe that any time you can stand up and state that you are an innocent victim of this nasty demon, and you have NOTHING to be ashamed about, whatever the results....it is a positive for your very soul! Ok....jumping off my soapbox now. Warm wishes to you, and I hope you'll keep us posted....

[mishelle]

Actually, I've never even thought about telling my dad, it was never an option in my head. But it's definitely something to think about doing...
He's a really scary man in a way to me, I've kind of put him on a pedestal (That I'm trying to take him down from, work in progress) and any shortcomings that I have I don't like him to know. I feel like if I tell him about it, he won't see it as an illness, but as either me being lazy or that something is wrong with me.

I did try medication once, but it made me extremely lethargic and I think that one time scared me away. It was definitely a problem during the time because I was still in school and I barely left my bed. I'm thinking about trying it again, but I have to wait until I visit the doctor on campus (It's free there )

Thank you for the advice!