Learning to trust yourself?

Through what process do you learn (or relearn) to trust your thoughts, instincts, emotions, etc.?

I find myself second guessing what I believe and experience constantly, and if nothing else, it is taking me out of the moment, disturbing my focus and concentration. But it can also trigger rumination and obsessive, fearful thoughts.

Hi. I'm not sure of your situation, so I'm flying blind here. Something must have happened to make you so unsure of yourself. Once you lose your mental compess, it can be difficult to come back from. I didn't listen to my instincts about my ex wife, and wound up paying a very heavy price, (not just financial, but emotionally). It can be difficult to trust again.

Can you tell us a little more about your situation?

Sam2

This is a tough one for me. I get some thoughts sometimes that are a little out of touch and really distorted. I try to analyze a lot of what I think and question firstly does this thought seem rational or logically.

An example of this is at work a lot of the engineers eat lunch together. When they go out and I don't get invited my first thought is everyone hates me and I should just quit. When I logically think about that it isn't valid. Being asked out to lunch isn't a poll of who likes who. Quoting my job isn't valid either because even if they don't like me or do, I need the money and work isnt about being liked, it is about doing your job and getting paid mostly.

If the thought seems rational I then think about if the emotions are more intense than what they should be. Sometimes I get full of despair and self hatred and it isn't proportional to the trigger. Such as failing something at school or work. Making a mistake or critisism I find shattering and sometimes the emotional response is far beyond what I think it should be. That is how I decide if I should trust myself.

For me if I had to second guess something simple like where will I park my car thats when I know I'm in a danger zone. I'm just giving you an example and sometimes I don't realise it. It might be my husband or sister or dad that would tell me "just park the car". Everyones process, thats just mine.. Best wishes to you

Can you give some examples of what things you second guess yourself on ?