[hezaa82]

I have a couple of people in my life who tease me and berate me when I get depressed. Has anyone else experienced this?

I have a bad habit of writing depressed status updates on facebook, just when I'm feeling really desperate and usually because I have some alcohol in me that's impairing my judgment. I think these two have some issues of their own - insecurity, wanting to feel superior to others, wanting to avoid looking at their own issues. I've tried in the past to explain to them rationally that sometimes I can't help feeling that way and that it's harmful to tell someone that they're wrong for being depressed. But it always ended in more anger and ridicule from them. Now I just ignore it but it still bothers me to an extent.

I suppose I could remove them from my facebook, but I guess there's a part of me that's so desperate for attention that I'll take even negative attention. I've got to work on regulating my emotions better too I guess.

[allimsaying]

Dont take negative attention. We'll give you positive attention here.

Originally Posted by hezaa82

I have a couple of people in my life who tease me and berate me when I get depressed. Has anyone else experienced this?

I have a bad habit of writing depressed status updates on facebook, just when I'm feeling really desperate and usually because I have some alcohol in me that's impairing my judgment. I think these two have some issues of their own - insecurity, wanting to feel superior to others, wanting to avoid looking at their own issues. I've tried in the past to explain to them rationally that sometimes I can't help feeling that way and that it's harmful to tell someone that they're wrong for being depressed. But it always ended in more anger and ridicule from them. Now I just ignore it but it still bothers me to an extent.

I suppose I could remove them from my facebook, but I guess there's a part of me that's so desperate for attention that I'll take even negative attention. I've got to work on regulating my emotions better too I guess.

Hey, you should not look at negative attention. That's the last thing you want to do. You should spend more time here-it's like Facebook, but with the benefit of positive support and nice nonjudgmental people. Give it a try. You'll THSNK yourself for it.

[doyoutrustme]

Consider unfriending them. I have limited knowledge of your relationship as a whole but if they make a depressed person feel worse- you can do without that.

I agree. Vent here. You will only get support.

[hezaa82]

thanks everyone. so many nice responses <3

I wouldn't say that I ever got "teased" for being depressed. But I feel like I do get patronized for being depressed. It's people that would say things like: "snap out of it, change your attitude, you have no reason to be like this", etc.

I agree with the others on here on that Facebook thing.

[shortandcute]

My brother in law used to purposely try to embarrass me in front of people, thinking it was gonna somehow snap me out of my depression.

[shortandcute]

Originally Posted by will19

I wouldn't say that I ever got "teased" for being depressed. But I feel like I do get patronized for being depressed. It's people that would say things like: "snap out of it, change your attitude, you have no reason to be like this", etc.

I agree with the others on here on that Facebook thing.

I had one lady tell me that I was "too young to think like that." Like how old are you supposed 2b b4 you're allowed to suffer from depression?!?!?!?

I just tried "explaining" depression to someone for the first time ever, and it was exhausting...I was told I used my T as a crutch and asked why the goal wasn't to get me out of there (therapy) as fast as possible
I finally got through to him as I stuck to my guns and didn't just haul it out of there (mostly because he had to drive me to my car, to be honest, sigh), and he seems to understand now and has explained some of what he said to me and why (his own life experiences, such as the bad marriage counseling he had, etc.). If I hadn't known this person for over 15 years I wouldn't have bothered to give him the benefit of the doubt and listen to his explanation, but we are communicating through it. And since I have like 2 friends otherwise (literally) and he is someone I can hang out with since we are both unemployed, I am going to see if he can be my friend.
Anyway, these people teasing you don't deserve to be your friend. The teasing has to be even worse than not understanding and giving you a hard time because they don't get it; they aren't looking to. I wouldn't give them the time of day anymore. You deserve to have only positive people in your life.

It's really ignorance that the "boys" are displaying, in my view. Anyone who understands depression is not likely to use that technique because it falls flatter than a pancake.

Select new friends who are intelligent about depression and understand about sensitivity.

You will receive support here and people do understand the difficulty of depression and
how hard it is to be positive when we are in a depressed state.

Be careful about the use of alcohol--it makes depression worse; that, you don't want
to happen. If you feel that seeing a psychiatrist for an evaluation and a little prescribed medication would help you get started on improving your feeling tone, I wouldn't hesitate to get that assistance. Those doctors are really alert to the needs of patients who are depressed, and there is so much that can be done to correct it or at least to make it far less bothersome.

Stay with the group here, please. They'll be of help as you try to overcome the
problem with depression.

[missminnie]

There's a lot of support here that will help you, don't let anyone else in your life bother you.

But i do know how it feels. When i was first experiencing depression it was hard to handle. All of my friends decided they did not want to be around me anymore because i was just "starting drama" and "looking for attention". That only made the depression worse. But i found new friends and a great support group online.

Hope you feel better

[Clara22]

I do not want to be rude, but people teasing you in that way are pretty stupid. I have not found anybody doing that to me, but "giving me unwanted advice" about my disability, oh Lord!, quite a lot. Before, I used to respond with a smile. Then, i went to the US and met a lot of brave disabled advocates that told me about self-confidence and saw their determination> i think I learned a bit from them. Now, if people patronize me, as Will relates above, I tell them what I think, or I just leave them alone. I tell myself I should not bother, i consider them to be immature.

[Pierro]

Dont hang around with people who make you feel bad about yourself. They are not friends.

[JadeAmethyst]

Meaness is a form of bullying IMO. People tease and make fun with their own reasons. I wish you well.
Jade

[hezaa82]

Thanks everyone. I do try and post on here but I still keep wishing I had IRL friend understood. I'll keep trying here.

[allimsaying]

Dont give up hezaa82!