[datguy2point9]

I guess I should just start from the beginning. My gf dumped me about a month ago. This is the first time in life I have realized its hard to live a life without a significant other. I am seeing a therapist but I really don't know what to do at this very moment.

I see my life as very very empty. I am 25, of Indian descent, introverted, dont have a lot of friends around me. I have a few which live out of state. Being introverted, I feel has slightly ruined my life right now. I am ok with being alone sometimes, but I am so bored 90% of the time.

I dont know how to make a life out of this..its so hard to just exist.

I feel happiest when I am out with a girlfriend where I can spoil her. Not being in a relationship right now, I hang out with family at times. I hang out with cousins most of the time.

I sit and cry..and nothing seems to work. I try to watch movies or shows and I come back and start thinking about life again.

I am looking for a job, but I have a semester left of school. I even sit at school with no friends to eat lunch..this is no way to live a life.

I realize my issue was dependency after going through 3 years of therapy with a Psychologist. I am no longer willing to let my life be dependent on a girl. I want to learn how to live a life on my own..and have a purpose.

I want to change.

I am stuck in a constant cycle of wanting to do something, but do not know what to do or where to start.

I dont know how to make friends. I dont like being in really big groups. I feel very very claustrophobic around a lot of people I dont know.

I have very low self esteem. I cant embrace my different personality and be completely happy with who I am.

I have been trying to meet different girls on a dating website. (I know I am going back into dependency with this, but Im still doing it. Meeting someone knew in life who I can connect with will make me feel good).

I have been drowned by constant rejection on the website. Confidence is seriously low now.

Whats my personality? Im very caring, put others before me; talkative.

I just want to seriously live a life where I feel I exist again.

What do I like to do? Watch Indian movies, watch cricket, used to play tennis and soccer. I have a love of cooking.

I have a good heart but cant show that side to anyone anymore.

Im not even sure typing all this will get me an answer on here, but it is worth a shot.

[Travelinglady]

Hi! I am wondering if you might consider going back into therapy, since it sounds like you have a lot of issues you haven't dealt with.

[bharani1008]

I agree that you probably need to talk to someone now. You are in a perfect place to do the change you know you must make. But you may need some guidance. Before you get back into a relationship it would be good for you to learn how to be alone a bit. Being an introvert means that you need to be alone sometimes or you'll get into sensory overload easily and that will tire you and make it harder to think clearly. Try to think of your aloneness as a necessary time for you to relax and not be under any pressure from another person.
If you have trouble connecting (I do) then find some activities in your college. If you can volunteer to help someone or something. It will instantly make you feel more positive. The expression " It's more blessed to give than receive" is true.(I'm not religious). Two good things happen. You feel better and have some purpose and the befriended one feels better and more hopeful.
You really do need to wait a while before getting into a new relationship.
Stay busy. Good luck

[gayleggg]

Hi, I agree, that volunteering is a good place to start whether at the college or in the community. I would also like to say I think dating websites are not a good idea. There are some sincere people on them but it is too easy to find ones that aren't. Therapy would also be good and give you an outlet for your feelings as well as learning to build your confidence.
Best wishes,
Gayle