[Djinn8]

Hi, it's been a long time since I was last on this forum, but I'm in a bad spot at the moment and I thought I'd turn to the internet for hope, advice and inspiration.

I moved to a new house with my girlfriend a while back and left my old social circle behind. After a year however nothing really rose to replace it. My girlfriend was doing ok - she has a mental illness and as such is part of various support groups where she makes lots of friends. I don't have anything like that, I don't have a job, and while I'm at university it's distance learning and doesn't afford me to meet people.

Most of my days I just spend pacing about the house with nothing to do, desperately trying to conceive of some solution to the problem. I set things up to get myself out and about, but nothing seems to work. I take volunteer jobs when I can and I go and do activities to socialize, but I'm always ALONE when I do it.

When I do get talking to someone and were getting along well, I'm forgotten the second I'm out of sight. Occasionally someone will ask me for my phone number or say that we should meet up sometime in the future, but they never call - presumably because they would rather spend time with a more established friend instead. If I call them it's just the same old story: "they'll call me the next time they're up to something". I'd like to be the one inviting them out, but that just feels awkward as I don't have a circle of friends to go out with and invite them to come along too.

It's getting to a point now where I'm feeling really isolated, lonely and depressed. I just can't seem to make friends and there doesn't seem to be any natural or effort-driven way to solve the problem. What should I do?

[online user]

Can you go back to where your circle of friends were and visit them? that might help your yearning for friendships, to rekindle those. It sounds like you are doing the right kind of things to make new friends.

Can you do couples things with your girlfriend and some of her friends?

Most people only make 1-2 real, true friends in their lives--the rest are more acquaintances. Hope you find yours soon!