[Mega21dmv]

Hi I need help because i am really depressed.
Reasons:
I'm ugly and I look at other people who are skinny and depressed and I think at least you have something going for you! I am also fat and try to diet but it never works. It doesn't help that I have no friends at all I mean I guess I'm just unlike able I'm also always pressured by my parents to make 99s in every class (which I can't ). But on top of every thing there is a person I truly love with all my heart and would die for them but they are older and they are nice but they probably know as that kid and nearly every night I cry myself to sleep. I just feel like I'm cursed and I'm a mistake and there is no point in living any longer and one time I got close to suicide. Please help

[smmath]

I am really sorry that you are going through that. It is tough. I highly doubt that you are actually ugly. You are not a mistake. Have you told anyone else how you feel? I find that talking to a therapist and people on here to be very helpful.

[Curupira]

I am really sorry you are feeling this way. I would second Smmath's suggestion of telling someone about this. Reaching out and asking for help can feel overwhelming, but one thing therapy can be very good for is helping you separate what the depression is making you see and feel from what reality looks like.

You sound like a wonderful, sensitive person. You deserve to not only be loved and accepted by others but also by yourself.

[Bill3]

I am really sorry for your pain. What level of school are you in? What would happen if you tried to speak to someone about your feelings, maybe a counselor at school?

[Frankbtl]

Hi there Mega (cool name!), first of all let's not worry about what she thinks about you (afterall there may be someone better out there for you if this goes nowhere, believe it or not!).
Let's instead focus on what YOU think about you. You know that looks are COMPLETELY subjective don't you (and there's no "ugly" in my book by the way!)?. You'll find as you get older that the people who really matter are going to find all sorts of things attractive e.g. someone's eyes, the way they smile, their facial expressions, their personality, their mannerisms.........and you really want friends, a partner who are really going to value you for YOU anyway don't you? I'm sure you have plenty about you if you can just be a little less hard on yourself and focus in on those things a little more?
And you know, maybe the no friends bit is a little more to do with the way you've been feeling as much as anything, maybe??
Do you think that you've been feeling so bad you just haven't had much motivation in making/allowing those connections, or perhaps your confidence/self esteem could have been putting some obstacles in your way? Now self esteem is something you could definately look at because there IS more about you, you ARE NOT ugly............want me to go on?? I know it might sound a lot easier said than done but..........
As for the pressure from your parents maybe talk with them about how it's making you feel and the effort you actually are putting in (a proper sit down talk!). Maybe if they understood more it would help. And who knows if you/we can have you feeling better about yourself you might feel a little more motivated and up those grades just a little.
BUT regardless, ABSOLUTELY don't think you're not good enough because of your grades WHATEVER they are. You can only do your best under whatever circumstances you're in, plenty of other people will have the same grades as you, AND there is so much more to someone than the grades they get.
REALLY hoping you can start to feel better, but we're here for you whenever you need.
Best wishes
Alison

[too SHy]

I too suffered some extreme circumstances as a kid, but by the adulthood rolls around you will be a far different person, which is a great thing. Keep focusing on your future, things get way better!

[Fuzzybear]

[LadyShadow]

(((hugs))))

I am also overweight and struggling with diets. Its just something we have to accept until we are ready to change our situation.

If you can talk to a school counselor about your feelings, maybe they will be able to help you. You're not alone, you can always keep posting on PC.

Be kind to yourself, you are worth a lot to many people that care about you.