I've always had issues with my self-esteem. Growing up the only thing I had confidence in was my brain but with depression even that is hazy and especially since it's impeding on my schoolwork and etc it makes me feel much less like a valuable person?

I guess I want to see how other people view themselves. Where do you think your worth comes from and how do you measure it? Is it growth? Or in the actions that you do for others?

[Astridetal]

I used to derive my worth from my brains, particularly academic success. I face the same issue you do, not being nearly as successful as I thought I'd be. In a way, I try to derive my self-wroth from my creativity, but then again people are constantly pushing me to make use of myintelligence by becoming more successful. I have autism which limits my ability to f unction more than my mental health problems do, bu people constantly reinforce the idea that I should derive my worth from success like independent living, going to college ot seeking a job. mean mental health professionals do this.

[Dirk Pitt]

I used to derive my self worth from accomplishment. I would develop sooo much confidence out of piggybacking technical solutions on top of each business success on top of each other; meanwhile proving dissenters and doubters wrong.

Alas, I learned that politics can interefere with this, and my ability to further my accomplishments was taken from me. I was told I was less than I was, that I did not compare well with more junior staff. Among the lies, I was told my accomplishments were worthless and should never be followed.

My job was removed from around me.

Ex workmates expressed their shock and anger at how I had been treated. They rallied behind and bolstered my opinion of my success and accomplishments. My friends and foes alike cemented the value of my accomplishments.

3+ years later, I am hunting still for a job. I experienced some deep depression over having my value-add endeavours ripped from my grasp. The teams, assets and resources I worked with suffered for my absence.

But that decision was not in my control.

I can count the millions I added in value, with my team, my resources and their assets. Perhaps I would blindingly do it again given the chance, forsaking the political risk all over just to bask in the accomplishment and knowledge I had successfully applied my technical reasoning to add value.

I miss my work friends. I liked my work friends. I would trade all of that experience and those 'job wins' to be able to sit across from them again and small talk about their technical dreams.

It's funny mostly because I am a raging Introvert.

I miss those good people. But I treasure those relationships, and if they saw something in me enough to be my friend, then they must be an accurate unbiased reflection of my worth?!

I get to be me.
Other people are my friends, and I call them the same.
And that I find priceless to my feeling of self worth.

[Webgoji]

Here's my conundrum:

From my personal perspective I have traits that should make me one heck of a person. Intelligent, caring, honorable, dependable ... all the traits that should make for someone that people strive to be.

BUT!

All of those traits are garbage. According to the world I'm ugly, dumb and a loser. This is coming from others, not myself. So I've got a real problem in that the world sees me one way and I see myself as something else.

So which do I trust?

If everyone else sees one thing I see something else, then the preponderance of evidence suggests they're correct.

[Hellion]

I've had self esteem issues for a long time as well...and yeah I was confident in my brain and being intelligent and all that, figured going to college and getting a degree and then a career would be my path.

But I kind of ended up with PTSD symptoms(still can't get a real diagnoses) and that kind of ruined that. I know I still have intelligent thoughts, and can still research information but I am a lot slower at researching information...and sometimes its just hard to think in general if that makes any sense. Honestly I haven't been feeling like I have much worth lately....and sometimes I wonder why people like my brother or dad even care about me.

[Fuzzybear]

Unfortunately, I was raised in a workaholic family so I tend to value my worth with how productive I am. I know this is unhealthy, and I've gotten better at trying to tell myself I have intrinsic value despite what I do or don't do. Right now I'm unemployed so I have a lot of time feeling unproductive.

[SeekerOfLife]

Excellent question! I have often wondered how a therapist measures human worth/value. Some therapists do not believe in God. So.....where does our value come from if not from God?

[Webgoji]

Originally Posted by seekersinking

Excellent question! I have often wondered how a therapist measures human worth/value. Some therapists do not believe in God. So.....where does our value come from if not from God?

This is my point exactly. If I even consider that perspective (which is given out freely), then I'm completely doomed and completely valueless since I don't belong to the right religion.

This reminds me of a really good quote!

“Who sees the human face correctly: the photographer, the mirror, or the painter?”
- Pablo Picasso

[gloamingone]

I've always derived my self-worth from work accomplishments. My father was always setting me up against my sister when I was growing up, and the attention would go to the most successful kid. Unfortunately, it was always her. So unless I perceive that I'm doing a great job, I feel horrible about myself. It got to the point where I was so paranoid about NOT doing a good job at work that I started having PTSD symptoms and panic attacks at work. So now I am absolutely terrified of working and do nothing.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

By how smart I am compared to others, by if someone I like likes me back, by if I have the body type I want.

I'm usually less smart than others, the person I like usually does not like me back, and I don't like my body.