[insane..ly smart]

I know that no one here can know for sure, but I just don't know anymore and I need a second opinion because my mom said that I do not need therapy, and because of that I am starting to contradict myself. Reader, do you think I need therapy?

When it comes to depression, I have some questions: is depression constant? I mean, when someone has depression are they ALWAYS depressed? I am not always depressed, but I get sad really really easily. Sometimes I will wake up and I will be in a really bad mood for no reason... actually that happens frequently. I will be extremely irritable and I will feel very sad and angry. Basically, I feel depressed, but not all of the time, I am still able to do my hobbies and stuff.

With anxiety, I am constantly nervous about EVERYTHING. Germs, physical injuries, death, being embarrassed in public, my future, etc. I worry about everything all of the time. I dont know if it is OCD or what, but I am ALWAYS paranoid. Do I have to be all sweaty and my heart racing and all that stuff to be considered anxious? sometimes I am like that, but not often. Only when I am in a scenario... you know, in the moment. like in social situations I get a racing heart, racing thoughts, i don't get sweaty, but I do fidget with my fingers frequently when i am in social situations. the 'anxiety' in social situations isn't always overwhelming, but occasionally it is.

There is more to this, but it starts to get really personal... and this is the internet. for example; why I feel depressed. Anyway, i would appreciate some insight on this crap because i haven't seen a psychologist or whoever the hell diagnoses people with mental disorders, i just attend therapy because i am a loser and i am weird .

i forgot to mention i am very violent and suicidal (not saying im going to kill myself, but i think about it all of the time... literally.) i don't know if that has anything to do with anxiety and/or depression, but i think those feelings alone are reason enough to attend therapy. THANKS FOR READING!... i guess.

[insane..ly smart]

definitely not hormones by the way. the way i feel, is not normal.. i think... maybe it is hormones... hmm.

[veiledregret1234]

Talking to a professional does no harm. The anxiety sounds rough.

[Rohag]

Hello, Insane..ly smart. You've been in therapy for a while, yes? What is your assessment of the therapy you've received -- do you feel it is laying the foundation for eventual progress?

Your symptoms sound severe enough that you may benefit from being screened by a medical doctor and/or psychiatrist.