[Altered Moment]

Ever since I joined these forums I have for some reason felt like I should read every post in this section and respond to the ones I relate to or have something to say.

I have been in the meds and addiction sections lately and there are like 4 pages of threads in this section that I have not touched. I can't keep up. I could spend all day. I think I am addicted to these forums and that is not healthy.

I am coming out of a depression and that is great so I need to get on with life and not stay in the house all day. But I do not want to be someone who gets all better and then never comes to these boards. That is not fair after it has helped me so much.

Don't feel bad if you don't come around when you're better. Sometimes I think that's for the best. There have been times where I've felt better and dropped in, and then ended up leaving far worse off than if I'd never shown up.

These boards are here for when you need them. If that means you've helped someone in the process, then wonderful. But if not, that's totally fine.

Reading every post and comment would be a feat, I think.

your posts will be missed if you don't come on as much, but if your depression is lifting, I think you owe it to yourself to get out there and enjoy life! Just keep checking in now and then and tell us about your successes! We (or at least I) need to hear that the good life is possible

Hello Zinco: Yes, I understand how you feel. I have a similar problem. But mine involves more than PC. I have channels on YouTube & Upload Society too. There's literally no way to keep up everything!

I want to read & respond to postings here on PC whenever I think I may have something useful to contribute. (Mercifully, that isn't all that often!) I have many friends on YouTube & I feel guilty any time I miss any of their videos. Since coming onto PC, I've all but abandoned Upload Society & I feel guilty about that too. And there's more...

I never used to think of myself as having an addictive personality. But I have come to realize that I am addicted to the internet. I can't complain too much though. It's not going too far overboard to say that it has kept me alive for the past 2+ years...

[regretful]

I "hit my stride" in 2012 and simply disappeared from here after writing my "depression success story"...in retrospect, I would have stayed around a bit, checking in once in a while to let folks I "knew" stay posted. It's like reading self-help books or praying, but only doing so when in crisis...perhaps if I were to have stayed continually connected, I could have staved off this depressive episode...with all that typing said, I am re-reading newgal's post, which is much more parsimonious than mine...

[littlemiss44]

I think it's awesome that yr doing better!! It's great to hear. Mine is slowly lifting too. But for some reason it still lingers.

I wish I could respond to every post but that's impossible. I relate to so many things that are shared here. I still wish I had a zest for life but I'll take what I can get! Meds are really working right now and I'm so thankful. I wish everyone suffering could feel better. I wish I had a magic wand to make us all feel good. I hope this feeling lasts cause I never know how I'm feeling day to day. I will always come here to see how everyone is doing. Wish me luck...just for today I will be thankful that I'm in a good mood.

Sent from my SGH-M919 using Tapatalk

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by newgal2

your posts will be missed if you don't come on as much, but if your depression is lifting, I think you owe it to yourself to get out there and enjoy life! Just keep checking in now and then and tell us about your successes! We (or at least I) need to hear that the good life is possible

I think you are right. Balance is important and getting on with life and taking advantage of the good times...because with my history I never know when it will hit again. Well actually I do know usually because it is so cyclical. I should be good until Nov. with a short term one middle of the summer. Last summer not. Maybe I will even make it past Nov. who knows.

It is ingrained in me from AA that just because you are all better now and got all this clean and sober time and life is well and wonderful, that you quit going to meetings. Because you have a responsibility to the new guy or gal that walks in the doors. How is that new person going to get helped if everyone leaves? And that is how you keep yourself sober is by helping others. If you stay away to long you are going to relapse. (damn near happened to me after I quit going for five years.) It is a huge part of AA philosophy.

So I feel like I owe it to people if i am doing good to stop in here every once in awhile and say what helped me. It wasn't that long ago I came here looking for any glimmer of hope. I had basically lost all hope and given up. I did find it here or at least I didn't feel alone. I wish we would hear more success stories because we need hope.

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by The Skeezyks

Hello Zinco: Yes, I understand how you feel. I have a similar problem. But mine involves more than PC. I have channels on YouTube & Upload Society too. There's literally no way to keep up everything!

I want to read & respond to postings here on PC whenever I think I may have something useful to contribute. (Mercifully, that isn't all that often!) I have many friends on YouTube & I feel guilty any time I miss any of their videos. Since coming onto PC, I've all but abandoned Upload Society & I feel guilty about that too. And there's more...

I never used to think of myself as having an addictive personality. But I have come to realize that I am addicted to the internet. I can't complain too much though. It's not going too far overboard to say that it has kept me alive for the past 2+ years...

I feel ya. Even in my sobriety and when I was doing good and not to depressed (except for my regular cycles and my full time moderate) I got addicted to this one online game. It wasn't a hugely popular one but it was very well made and realistic as hell. It was a first person shooter but you had to wait to join the server until the current game was done. Maybe a half hour. So that kept all the run and gun script kiddies out.

I joined a squad or team. I was a private. The game was very strategic if played right. A first person shooter war game. But if done right with experienced players very strategic. And much better if you were on a squad. The guys who were good at programming would design these awesome maps with different types of goals and such to get points and kills counted as points. We all had head phones and mics and a communication program we used so we didn't have to type in the game to communicate. We had training maps and rank and medals and the whole damn thing just like the marines. We had matches every weekend and would spend as much time during the week as we could practicing.

In fact the marines hired the company to build a version for them for virtual training and the guy who started my squad was in the marines and was helping implement the game in training at twenty nine palms. He got killed in Faluja Iraq by a planted explosive while handing out a medal. Very sad.

Any way I was totally addicted for five years. I worked and played the game, that was it. My young daughter would come over and it was watch tv because I am playing this game and we have a match today. If you didn't show up for practice or a match everyone was pissed at you. They were all addicted too and ignoring their families over a game. Luckily I was divorced and only had my daughter part time but it robbed a lot of time from her. By the end I was very good and Captain of the squad and admin of the forums and helped build and maintain the website and even learned enough programming to make my own maps. One good thing was I learned a ton about computers.

Damn it was fun. I mean really fun and very addictive. After five years I had had enough and walked away and never looked back. I am sure they were pissed. I had some very good online friends from all that. I have not played an online game or war game since. That is how I am though I get burned out on something or sick of it or I got good at it I walk away. All or nothing, no balance. That is how addicts are. I am still looking for balance.

So yeah try some online gaming..... There were some good aspects of the whole experience not all bad. There are worse addictions. My biggest regret was the time I robbed my daughter of. Other than that it was really all on me and not overall healthy. I still have problems in my upper back from my mouse hand and sitting at that damn computer so long. And here I sit typing away like a maniac.

[Altered Moment]

And I am sure you know and I'll bet very few know.....I just found out.

That there is a limit of 12 smiley face images in a post!!!!

It's a problem I fluctuate with too depending on how well I'm feeling. I guess in my personal opinion, the forums should only be used as a tool to help people get better. It's meant to be a supportive place and if it's beginning to eat up too much time or bring you down I really encourage you to take a bit of a break or limit your time here (which is what I'm currently doing). No one here wants to bring you down when you're finally on an upswing and I have seen it in myself when I've been feeling a lot better but (and as much as I love this site) it zaps your energy and suddenly you're tired or have thrown off your sleeping schedule to try and respond to a bunch of things. I've chosen to be much less habitual with checking this site because while I love to provide for people, I also need to focus on my own growth so later I can come back with a giant success story and lots of advice to share.

And in the end the forums will live on Because there are beautiful people coming here everyday but you cannot live without you and even if the forums have given you a lot of support, don't waste it! Get back on your feet and check in from time to time with us

I'm so glad you're feeling better! Cheers!

[Altered Moment]

Thanks all. From the bottom of my heart.

The depression section can be tough and that is probably why I am avoiding it because I am feeling better.

[Fuzzybear]

[ginaaa22]

hope you continue to feel better

[MotherMarcus]

Holy Crap is a great title for a thread.