Just sad

That's all I feel atm, sad. I was in hospital for a week, came out on Thursday. But I can't even work out if it helped or not...while I was inpatient my bf told me he needed a break. And so now I'm living with my parents. The whole thing is messing with my head..a lot. And now I don't know if I just feel awful because of that, or if I feel awful anyway and that's just making it worse. I've been living in a bit of a bubble since he told me, and doing my best not to think about it. I just don't want it to be real. Every time it hits me again it feels like he just told me. No idea how I'm meant to get through this really.

Sorry, there isn't really a point to this...I just needed to get it out.

Also apologies for not really being there for anyone...I'm finding it hard to concentrate enough to even read posts, let alone reply. But I'm thinking of you all and hope you're doing ok

((((((((( secretwhisper )))))))))

Dear Secret Whisperer...

Gentle hugs...you really are going through a lot and deserve to be sad. There is a reason you went to the hospital, and it can already be a bit disconcerting and a "let down" when you get out. On top of that the time out with your bf and coming into another environment at your parents can be stressful. You have a lot to heal from and I'm sure a lot of emotions and thoughts running through your heart and mind.

I'm so glad that you wrote to find some relief and connection here. We are all very concerned and of course you need to take care of yourself right now. If there is anything I or anyone else can do, please let us know...

Try to continue to be very gentle with yourself and continue to get the thoughts on paper or in your T's hands so that you can work through them and continue the healing process that you started in the hospital. Is there any outpatient provisions or day programs you could go to in order to continue with some extra support? Might be worth asking.

Take good care and know you are in our hearts too.

Kindly,
Wysteria Blue

secretwhisper I'm so sorry you are having to go through all this at one time.

I, also, agree with Wysteria

Thanks, I am going to daily group therapy, as well as my T so I'm not alone with this. I just find it so hard to get my thoughts out into words and sentences that make sense. Would be nice to just be knocked out until this all blows over...lol

I just found out tonight that a family friend has probably not got long left to live...throw more crap at me why don't ya...!

Try not to get stuck in numbness, it can be useful to deaden the edge to all the hurt but you do need to allow the feelings to be real to get over them. It sucks, to get better you need to feel the crap. Are your parents supportive or do you find it difficult to talk to them? If you can, allow your parents to nurture you, let them give you a safe, warm place when you need it.

Secretwhisper, you are such a nice good person. I am sorry you are having so much trouble to deal with at this time. I agree. Don't be too hard on yourself. Message me anytime you want. I am glad you have some outpatient therapy. I also hope your parents can be very supportive.

I just don't wanna feel the crap! But I know I have to. It's seeping in slowly. My parents have been really supportive and are doing everything they can to try and make me feel better but I do find it hard (impossible) to talk to them about stuff.

Hello, secretwhisper. You are mourning the loss of friend now; an addition to what already has been going on.

Coping with Grief and Loss: Support for Grieving and Bereavement

(((secret)))

I am sorry to hear that you are in pain. I had msn breakup with me while I was in a depressive state. It hurts a lot. Sometimes it hurt to breathe. I would talk to your doctor and tell him/her what you are experiencing. Maybe he can help.
If not talk to a counselor. They can help you cope and give you the tools to get over this hump.
Major hugs to you. I am so sorry you are hurting.

Nolafelind

(((secretwhisper)))

(((((Secret)))))). Hope you have better days coming.

I really can't stand this. I don't want to feel, but today the feelings keep breaking through. If my means hadn't been found then that would be my next step. I just wish I had the chance before it got found. Now I'm stuck and have to find the means all over again.