[Bitbybit]

I'm new here and looking for a supportive community. I've experienced depression and anxiety on and off for several years, but recent changes have really intensified the battle. I don't have a good support network where I live--scratch that, I have NO support network where I live. I have a great job that I love, but recently I keep thinking "is this it?" Over and over. I'm alone; I have no SO, no kids, no family close by. I'm very lucky to have a great family and good friends, but they all live far away. It feels like my life has stalled. Is this normal for depression? I'm not sure. Every day feels like a wash cycle: rinse, repeat, dry, fold. I actively want to make my life better, but I feel disconnected from everyone and everything. Suggestions on small steps to take? I'm open to ideas.
It's strange that even though I feel as though I make a difference at work, I feel so purposeless. I've thought about moving close to my family, but I'm worried that my thinking is too depressed to make a good choice. Also, I think part of my desire to "return home" is because I feel my like my adventures are over. I'm worried that if I return home (even though I really want to be near my family), I'll feel even more defeated. I won't have a job that is meaningful, and I'll be thinking of my life as one long plateau. I'm curious whether talk therapy could help me? I've never tried it.

[Abe Froman]

I recently started therapy for the first time. I was resistant to it my whole life. But finally enough was enough. It's been good to me I think. I recommend at least giving it a try.

Changes? Well I didn't have a degree, so when I hit a hard spot in 2009 my response was to get my butt back in school. It has been a positive experience. Perhaps you could consider working towards a degree(second one if you already have one) or taking any kind of community classes on a topic that interests you. Cooking, martial arts, whatever comes to mind. Same as therapy, you can always quit going if it turns out not to be your thing.

[Rohag]

Hello & Welcome, Bitbybit. Talk therapy might help you; it does help some percentage of those who participate in it. Much depends on the "fit" between you and your individual therapist.

Abe Froman is exactly correct - if therapy (or a therapist) proves unhelpful, you can quit.

Depression robs us of the capacity to feel fulfillment. It is likely, I observe, to follow you wherever you go. You are wise to question your reasoning and decision-making in a depressed state. Getting good counsel of some form is a Good Idea.

Please make yourself at home.