Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Oct 14, 2014, 08:48 AM
iditp20's Avatar
iditp20 iditp20 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: Newcastle Upon Tyne
Posts: 196
How does it make you feel when your partner doesn't know what to say to you and doesn't know how to support you with your mental health issues?

The lack of understanding really agitates me

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

advertisement
  #2  
Old Oct 14, 2014, 02:06 PM
Rose76's Avatar
Rose76 Rose76 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 12,868
It makes me feel very disappointed. I tend to think that it is due to lack of interest in helping me. After being with someone for years, as I have been, I think he could have learned more by now.

My partner has said repeatedly, "I don't understand anything about depression, so I really don't know what to say to you." It makes me mad. I've read everything I could find on every type of problem that he has so I could best understand how to help him. (And he's had plenty of problems.)

Ultimately, it makes me withdraw from the relationship. No point going to draw water from a dry well. Then he feels lonely when I stay away from him during times of the blues. So we're both worse off.

Partners of people with mental health issues sometimes don't realize they could be helpful, if they would just take an interest in understanding. When they don't, it contributes to the distress of the person with the issues.
  #3  
Old Oct 14, 2014, 03:59 PM
marmaduke's Avatar
marmaduke marmaduke is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Sep 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,239
It makes me feel really pissed off.
I was telling my partner some really sensitive stuff from my childhood, and he said, wait for it-----------------------------"I've got earache" = Read 'I'm bored'
Earache.
Um. Well thanks for your understanding and support.
This really upset me big time, and made me wonder 'What am I doing here'. Couldn't he have just for once have listened, and made the right noises. Sympathized with me?

Dont get me wrong, I do not expect anyone to listen to endless tales of woe. I try not to mention my 'issues' very often, but now and again I get a bad day and someone to talk to, vent to would be nice.
Hugs from:
Pierro
  #4  
Old Oct 14, 2014, 04:02 PM
lilypup's Avatar
lilypup lilypup is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: out west
Posts: 1,606
Do they read? I had a lot of luck with this with my husband and best girlfriend. Just even a pamphlet or quick article or two.
__________________
Lamictal
Rexulti
Wellbutrin
Xanax XR .5
Xanax .25 as needed
  #5  
Old Oct 14, 2014, 07:29 PM
waterknob1234's Avatar
waterknob1234 waterknob1234 is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Feb 2014
Location: in school
Posts: 1,773
It is irritating because you depend on your partner for support, so this person should be there for you. My husband was not helpful at first. He did not like the idea that my doctor prescribed me anti-depressants. He was of the mindset people should not take "that kind of medicine." In time he has become more patient and helpful. I like the idea of giving him an article on depression and mental illness. Best of wishes.
  #6  
Old Oct 15, 2014, 01:32 AM
iditp20's Avatar
iditp20 iditp20 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: Newcastle Upon Tyne
Posts: 196
I agree it does make you worse.

Mine is like I don't know, I don't want to know. Even when I've bought leaflets home she doesn't pay any attention.

I am so wrapped up in my depression that I can't see past it. It causes so many relationship problems and makes me hate myself more.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Reply
Views: 768

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:14 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.