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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Feb 14, 2015 at 10:41 AM
#961
My brain won't shut up either, hasn't for years, I miss having a good sleep, wish I could remember a time when my ears didn't ring like nuts, wish I had a way to get to the store, had enough money.... and I'm feeling like commiserating with misery today
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 angelene, Anonymous37807, Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, herethennow, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Feb 14, 2015 at 11:06 AM
#962
How many times have I heard the phrase "it gets better" vs. How many times it actually got worse instead of better?...
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| angelene, Anonymous37807, Anonymous445852, Bark, Clara22, color14u, herethennow, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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 herethennow, Nammu
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Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2013
Location: RJAA!
Posts: 1,006
11 1,850 hugs
given 
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Feb 14, 2015 at 12:13 PM
#963
On the bed and wishing i could just cease to exist so as to not live this pain...
__________________ "The is no better exercise for the human heart than reaching and lifting others up." - John Holmes herethennow: This ward is a prison! dx: recurrent MDD.
Wardmate: No.. here's not a prison. *points to brain* Here is. |
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| angelene, Anonymous37807, Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, Nammu, Turtlesoup
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Member
Member Since Nov 2009
Location: Rocky Mountains
Posts: 451
15 947 hugs
given |
Feb 14, 2015 at 01:10 PM
#964
At the hospital watching Road Runner cartoons with husband. I feel better than yesterday
__________________ I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell |
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| angelene, color14u, Nammu, TheOriginalMe
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angelene, Bark, Clara22, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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Poohbah
Member Since Oct 2008
Location: PsychCentral
Posts: 1,185
16 8,255 hugs
given
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Feb 14, 2015 at 01:17 PM
#965
Quote:
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| dandylin
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Clara22, dandylin, herethennow, Turtlesoup
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Poohbah
Member Since Oct 2008
Location: PsychCentral
Posts: 1,185
16 8,255 hugs
given
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Feb 14, 2015 at 01:18 PM
#966
Made sandwiches. Woo. Not that bad....
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| dandylin, TheOriginalMe
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angelene, Clara22, Nammu, Turtlesoup
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Feb 14, 2015 at 01:39 PM
#967
Quote:
(Can you detect my bitterness in this one) |
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| angelene, Bark, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Feb 14, 2015 at 01:40 PM
#968
Today is a typical Saturday. Just doing some cleaning and shopping later on. Very warm outside and that's unusual for this time of year. I feel a little bit sluggish. Nothing eventful later on. Just nice to have a break from work.
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angelene, Turtlesoup
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Magnate
Member Since Apr 2013
Posts: 2,188
11 5,526 hugs
given
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Feb 14, 2015 at 02:19 PM
#969
Quote:
__________________ Clara Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out. Vaclav Havel |
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angelene, TheOriginalMe
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Magnate
Member Since Apr 2013
Posts: 2,188
11 5,526 hugs
given
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Feb 14, 2015 at 02:21 PM
#970
Quote:
__________________ Clara Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out. Vaclav Havel |
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Bark
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Feb 14, 2015 at 02:24 PM
#971
Quote:
It's very depressing, I'll admit. It's about losing people.The end of the poem ties in with the title. ...YOURSELF Lately Ive been flaking off (paint chips.) each piece a person who was in my life, but left me. Whether death or choice, each left and took a piece of me with them. Now I find its hard to move on with all these holes and parts falling out its hard to limp through life with no crutch, no love, and the same broken-leg hurt. Torn memories wave in the mind like torn white waving flags. Give up as now, all you have is |
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| Bark, herethennow, Nammu, TheOriginalMe
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angelene, Angelique67, Bark, color14u, herethennow, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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Magnate
Member Since Apr 2013
Posts: 2,188
11 5,526 hugs
given
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Feb 14, 2015 at 02:29 PM
#972
Quote:
__________________ Clara Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out. Vaclav Havel |
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angelene, Angelique67, Bark
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Crone
Member Since May 2010
Location: Some where between my inner mind and the solar system.
Posts: 73,978
(SuperPoster!)
14 57.3k hugs
given
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Feb 14, 2015 at 05:03 PM
#973
I feel so normal since starting these meds. Even though I needed an adjustment upward, I have no side effects apart from a stiff neck for a short time after I take them. I was watching a series on TV when I relized I haven't felt "normal" for years.
 That made me wonder what if I'd found this combo of meds 30 years ago? Would I have had a chance at finishing college, keeping a job, not having so many physical problems? Better not go there. Can't change what has passed. 
__________________ Nammu Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. ... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
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| angelene, Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, color14u, SeekerOfLife, TheOriginalMe
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Bark, Turtlesoup
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Member
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: in a life of delusion
Posts: 80
9 960 hugs
given |
Feb 14, 2015 at 05:59 PM
#974
I feel like I need to do or accomplish something today, but I don't know what???? There has got to be something I can do or plan to do...
__________________ Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. no matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness got there first, and is waiting for it - Terry Pratchett |
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| angelene, Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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Veteran Member
Member Since Oct 2014
Location: US
Posts: 698
10 1,753 hugs
given |
Feb 14, 2015 at 06:39 PM
#975
Death in the extended family yesterday, so I went to visit those mainly affected by it. Good to get out of the house and see everyone, horrible that it took such a loss to get me over there.
__________________ * Panic Disorder w/ Agoraphobia * Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder * Hoarder * Fibromyalgia * Major Depressive Disorder w/ Recurrent Major Depressive Episodes ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I exist here. I must learn to walk in this world." |
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| Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, color14u, herethennow, Nammu, Turtlesoup
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Out of Order
Member Since Feb 2014
Location: England
Posts: 15,860
(SuperPoster!)
10 17.5k hugs
given
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Feb 14, 2015 at 06:43 PM
#976
This itching is driving me nuts. I don't have a rash or anything, just sore places from where I've scratched. I hope this is just winter skin, please let this be winter skin. I'm worrying (because I always worry) that the itching is a sign of liver problems, my last LFT was raised, due to my meds.
TMI - alert I'm staring at every wee that I do, thinking is that dark, how dark is dark? I'm staring at every poo thinking is that pale, how pale is pale? Are my eyes yellow? Then there is the fatigue and general malaise of the past few days too. However, I know I get somatic symptoms and this week has been a stressy one, so maybe I'm fussing over nothing. I keep telling myself, this is just winter skin. I suppose if this doesn't resolve by Monday I'll see my GP for another LFT. |
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| angelene, Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, color14u, Nammu, Turtlesoup
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Feb 14, 2015 at 11:14 PM
#977
It was a busy and nice day today. But nothing much socially. Didn't do anything with anyone today. Very lonely, but I kept myself busy enough. Sometimes on the weekends, I realize how lonely I really am. Sometimes it feels pathetic.
Very hot outside today and it sapped my energy. It's still warm tonight. I will watch a movie at home. I hope that the neighbors do not make much noise because I have to keep the windows open. I guess as the temperatures go up, the IQs go down. That's why I get very depressed and hate hot weather. |
| angelene, Bark, Clara22, color14u, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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Legendary
Member Since Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 12,666
(SuperPoster!)
13 5,492 hugs
given
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Feb 15, 2015 at 04:32 AM
#978
I'm still doing pretty good. Slightly dismayed that I gained 5 pounds since Christmas.
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| angelene, Bark, Clara22, color14u, dandylin, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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Bark, dandylin, Nammu
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Poohbah
Member Since Oct 2008
Location: PsychCentral
Posts: 1,185
16 8,255 hugs
given
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Feb 15, 2015 at 06:12 AM
#979
Thought I'd listen to calm music and tell myself to have nice dreams. I dreamed I was inpatient. Again. And it felt so real. I hate it. I don't want to be back there. It's pointless.
Woke up depressed. But I have to do something today. Like eat properly and study. |
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| angelene, color14u, dandylin, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Feb 15, 2015 at 07:06 AM
#980
Oh Man, it's another day of feeling very depressed. I just don't feel like doing anything. Not even sure if I want to go jogging, which I always got pumped to do. Wonder if I should call my pdoc's office tomorrow and let him know what's going on? He did reduce my Effexor dose not long ago. Maybe that's a contributor to this . . . ?
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| angelene, Bark, color14u, dandylin, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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