[annoyedgrunt84]

Sometimes I honestly don't understand why people are upset with me. It's just a mystery to me I don't know what I said or did that was so upsetting to them. I Just feel like I'm walking on eggshells all the time. Everything I Say gets dissected. Why are people so judgmental?

[Frankbtl]

Hi annoyedgrunt,

I'm sorry you're struggling with some of the people in your life along with everything else
I'd say, if you could, maybe straight out ask them what/why what you've said or done has upset them.
Sometimes people can take things out of context, there maybe some miscommunication between you, they may not understand or need a bit more explanation, they may know more or less than you about particular situations when they're judging your reaction to them, they may have very fixed viewpoints different to yours.........and those are just some possibilities.
So yes, do you think you could just straight out ask them??? Unless you'd feel better asking someone close to you and to them, although with that there is the danger that they may not know for sure and mislead you. Usually much better asking the person/people themselves.



Alison

[Olanza-what?]

I have this problem from time to time. I end up reliving the conversation to see if it was me or did I misunderstand the comments. It this makes me feel attacked and picked on or even bullied. Well there are three things I would like to share with you actually four.

1. You/I get to chose our emotions. Though sometimes hurtful, and even hard to understand why, we still get to choose to react to the comments/behavior or not react. I normally choose to not react, I like staying in control and don't want anyone making those kind of choices (my emotion, i.e. angry, happy, sad) for me.

2. On a good day (when everything is going great for me) I toss it out the window. If they don't address me directly with the issue they have with me, then it's not important nor is it my problem, it's theirs (they chose to react). But, I am willing to help them work their problem out if asked.

3. On a bad day (when the world is sitting on my shoulder, nothing I do is right, and the list goes on)I toss it out the window. I don't need added stress, confusion, negativity or anything else that will add to my difficult day.

4. Confounded, dang it? Well?, um, um, dang it! I forgot what number 4 was?

5. Oh yea, now I remember. Number 4 it what makes people angry with me. First of all, my attention span is short. and secondly, my temper is even shorter! I'm bipolar of course.

I don't know if I was helpful or not. I do know that "You're Not Alone". I agree with Frankbtl, that perhaps you ask the individual (if you are comfortable with them or have a good relationship with the individual) "Are you upset with me? Did I say or do something wrong"?

Wishing You Nothing But The Best

[Fuzzybear]