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Junior Member
Member Since Mar 2015
Location: England
Posts: 17
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Jun 22, 2015 at 09:53 AM
#1
Hello,
Im currently in therapy for anger/abusive parent. Finding it difficult to feel emotions. My T said he thought i could be withdrawn, what is this? Is it linked to depression? How is it treated? I'd be grateful if someone could shed some light, thanks. |
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 Fuzzybear, hpocus
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Wisest Elder Ever
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Jun 22, 2015 at 10:00 AM
#2
idk... I was labelled as withdrawn throughout school...(naturally I received no "help" of any sort ) It could (possibly!) be linked to abuse
 If trust was repeatedly violated, then there is no reason to trust - - withdrawn behaviour? Anything said likely to lead to further abuse 
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| marmaduke
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 passingout
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Wisest Elder Ever
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Jun 22, 2015 at 10:12 AM
#3
PS I think it's wise to be very careful in trusting a therapist. There are many caring and compassionate therapists out there, but not all of them are. Some may become "bored" after years and change from appearing caring to being abusive, like one I saw. I have to believe that I was exceptionally unlucky with the "care" provider I saw. In time, hopefully you are "wiser" than I was, and you'll know for yourself if this service provider deserves your trust, and for you to be open with them
always remember they are providing a service and should never be judgemental. It takes a long time to trust for some people (obviously). My apologies for the rubbish reply, I don't have time to edit it down to one sentence
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marmaduke, passingout
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Jun 22, 2015 at 10:14 AM
#4
I'm so sorry. Abuse in childhood can make all emotions feel scary. If you had a parent that got angry at you crying, for instance, you learn not to ever cry.
Treatment is - and it's wicked hard - have emotions, and show them, in a safe space with a person you can trust. Hopefully your therapist will start you off with happiness and laughter.  I think - I don't know, so take this with a grain of salt - that not allowing yourself to feel anything is not linked to depression, but it sure as heck sounds like something that could lead to depression, if you bottle everything up for an extended period of time. |
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passingout, vital
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Out of Order
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Jun 22, 2015 at 10:51 AM
#5
Withdrawal is one of the coping mechanisms I developed to survive a childhood where I witnessed violence and abuse. To protect myself I would hide away all my emotions so the bad stuff couldn't hurt me. As an adult, I hide away my emotions when facing difficult situations, I also tend to withdraw physically and become isolated, again so I can't get hurt. Do you think that this is what your therapist means?
Your therapist should try to draw you out of the withdrawn place, maybe by talking about things you enjoy or maybe by focusing on your strengths. It is a two way process, you'll have to meet your T halfway, so if you don't understand what they want you to try let them know. I made the mistake of thinking I was engaging only to be told on the last session I hadn't engaged at all. I hope your therapy journey is a good one. |
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| Fuzzybear
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Wisest Elder Ever
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Jun 22, 2015 at 01:32 PM
#6
I'm sorry to hijack...
I'm completely  but not ... By this" I made the mistake of thinking I was engaging only to be told in the last session I never engaged at all" WTF?? I'm amazed I'm still surprised by the horror stories of the "care" provided for people in severe DISTRESS by the NHS  A similar thing happened to me, although I paid for it  A complete U turn and invalidation to the point of violation But they want us to stay on this planet? Clearly they do NOT Sorry if this triggers, I'm beyond disgusted by some who should know better IRL
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