[RileyRonan]

Hi Everyone,

So...I don't know how to start so I'm just going to jump right in.

I really, truly feel like I have no one to talk to (or can't talk to anyone) about my depression and I need some help dealing with my depression, finding friends, or just getting some advice from you guys.

To make a really long story short, I feel dead stuck in place and like I have no one to turn to for help with my depression. I have been to therapists off and on and I just can't open up to them; I don't feel safe opening up to strangers because of stuff that happened when I was between the ages of 11 and 15.

So, does anyone here have any tips for me? I've rewritten this message twice because I went off too long into my life story, so excuse how brief this message is.

Like, when you are out of college and have no friends, are trying to find a full-time job while you work a stressful (and borderline nerve-frying) part-time job, and are physically around all of these people that you just don't feel like you can be yourself around--let alone express your depression to--how do you deal? I have a large family and, because of my financial situation, still live at home with my parents but I just can't talk to any of them. My parents are not a source right now--mainly because they're a huge cause of stress, anxiety, and depression for me right now. So...I just feel like all of these people that I'm physically around are not people I can turn to and the people that I'm emotionally close to but not physically close to...I guess those emotional ties are breaking from the distance between us.

Anyway, how do you guys deal with your depression? More than that, have any of you been in a situation similar to this and managed to overcome it? How did you do so? What advice to you have on recognizing and expression your emotions and thoughts and conquering at least some part of your depression?

Things have been way worse for me than they are now, but I've never felt like I had no one to talk to so I'm really at a loss. Hobbies don't distract me because I'm a perfectionist to the utmost degree, so anything I love turns into a job and a huge stressor and self-confidence destroyer.

Also, having graduated from college last year, I have no idea as to how to make friends or get into a romantic relationship. I'm really terrified when it comes to making friends unless I can talk to that person about my interests and passions in-depth and know that they share at least some of those interests and passions with me. I'm not really good at keeping friendships because, as my mom once told me, I shy away when people start to get close. Do you guys have suggestions on how to get over these sorts of issues (or use them to my advantage in making and keeping friends)? How in the world do you make friends after college?

Again, I apologize for this being so brief. Twice I wrote this and twice I rewrote this because I went way too deep and couldn't find a way out without starting over.

Please let me know of any and all advice, suggestions, etc. that you have (even criticisms if that will help me).

Thank You So Much,

RileyRonan

[CaliforniaWoods]

Hi, Riley, I started writing on this Forum a few days ago 'cause I felt I had no one to talk to, and I sent an email to samaritans.org using the same word you used on your post..."stuck".

I feel stuck 'cause I don't have many friends who I can go out with, or who could introduce me to new people. I like to go out alone a lot, but I want a "gang" to hang out with.

I had a pretty bad weekend, and then I got a message, of a one week seminar, so I'm gonna go...and see how it goes. I'm pretty nervous about it, all that new people...artsy people...it's about philosophy and I didn't even get the purpose of the seminar very good but hell! I'm desperate! ha.

So I just sent an email confirming that I am going, and I started to think... how am I going to cope being in the middle of people I don't know and probably are more outspoken than me?. I think I'll try to ignore them and just think on the subject and trip it...and then I can think about talking to people.

So...what I'm thinking is...maybe you can look for a seminar or a small course. Sometimes coffee shops give "barista" tips for two hours or so, and you can just sink into the details around you, beside the people. Take it all in..."trip it". And with that in mind you can then focus on the people and you'll have something else in mind you can use for small chat, in case you need it.

My seminar is Monday next week so, I'll try that and I'll tell you how it goes.

BTW, your name reminded me of the movie Inside Out

[petunia123]

Riley I can feel that you are lonely as I am. I don't have many friends either but I just keep on going. Keeping busy distracts me at times but not when I feel anxious and sad. Sometimes I feel angry that I have this illness but I feel so lost right now. I cancelled my shift today to go see my therapist of 10 years. I have actually been in therapy with other people since 1982. I have had the works, hospitals, ECT did not work so I have tried to find solace in my faith. Life goes on no matter what. I hope every day you feel better.

[Smileonmyface]

i don't have a lot of advice but wanted to say i've been there. now 35 and still trying to figure it out. i never had many friends in high school or college, and the few i had were far away and lost touch with them quickly after. i find this forum to be a huge help as far as feeling more connected to people. without this i would never talk to anyone outside of my little family. i still don't have friends really that i can see face to face. i've all but given up on that. but i come on here and feel better, talking to others like me. i hope that you can find it as helpful as i have, and welcome

[vital]

Originally Posted by RileyRonan

...
Anyway, how do you guys deal with your depression? More than that, have any of you been in a situation similar to this and managed to overcome it? How did you do so? What advice to you have on recognizing and expression your emotions and thoughts and conquering at least some part of your depression?

Hi RileyRonan,

This was a H U G E help for me:

http://egg.bu.edu/~youssef/SNAP_CLUB...0164151576.pdf

I also do yoga, pranayama, walking and diet. I've got some general advice here too

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

- vital

[newday2020]

Hello RileyRonan......welcome...it seems to me you will do very well here with making friends. You express yourself well and sound like an interesting person. Start here, you'll get some friends and you'll branch out from there. You want friends and you will get some.