Overcoming Adversity

PrincessPlatinum · Apr 02, 2016, 09:24 PM

Dear Psych Central Friends,

It's been a long and difficult year for me. But things finally started looking up when I finally got a job. I was so excited because it was my first job. That first day was magic. Everyone was so nice there, and it wasn't hard to feel like I belonged there. It was a moment I knew I'd never forget, finishing that first day. I was triumphant with victory. The second and third day were also good, and I completed the online training.

And then, the fourth day, the training was over, and I was thrust into the real world- and that's when everything changed.

The job I started was in retail, and I was woefully unprepared for it. The long hours on my feet hurt my back so much I had to take painkillers. I have at at least 4 different managers and all of them were telling me different ways to do my job, and no two were saying the same thing. Quickly, the novelty of a new job wore off and I slid into depression. I couldn't find motivation to get out of bed in the morning. This lack of motivation led to my hours getting cut, and it seemed like all was lost. I stopped doing things I loved, trying to focus on getting better at my job. I felt alienated from my coworkers even though they were the closest thing to friends I had. To my dismay I continued to spiral into depression.

Three days after my hours were cut, I got a text from my fiancé that he had been attacked at work, and had a concussion and a swollen lip, but otherwise he was fine. The injuries were minor, but it turned my world upside down. I got to see him two days after it happened. It may not have been much, but it changed me.

The next day (my day off) I started writing again, something I always loved to do. I watched my favorite TV shows and read my favorite books. I made time for myself. Today when I went to work I was happy. I smiled and talked with people, was told I was doing a good job, and I felt confident. In the tragedy of my fiancé's attack, I found the motivation I needed to get up in the morning- to get one day closer to forever with him. It wasn't the most conventional way to overcome depression, but it worked. I'm slowly finding myself again, and I learned an important lesson: never give up who you are for the sake of working. You will find a way to incorporate yourself into your work if you give it enough time. To anyone else with the workplace blues, I'm here for you. I know how tough it can be to be in a place where you feel you don't belong, when you don't feel like you can talk about it to anyone. If you feel comfortable enough, talk about it with a manager. They can actually be a good resource to get on the road to recovery. If the misery continues and you can't find who you are or where your joy is, I simply have this advice for you: Find your happiness. Even if it isn't there. You will be able to feel joy again someday. Don't give up, and try to keep smiling.

Sincerely,
PrincessPlatinum