Unavoidable Trigger

I had a trigger that I was able to hide from my view so that it wouldn't be triggered daily and every weekend. Not really my doing but he made a move so that I couldn't see him anymore.

Suddenly this weekend I can see him again. He unhid the stuff he had hidden without warning. This triggered me badly yesterday.

I really do not want him to know that he triggers me. We're friends and coworkers and want that to remain in place without additional discomfort. I'm talking about this in therapy but the unexpected exposure this weekend shook me.

Doing a little better about it today unless I end up seeing more.

I'm struggling day to day and really a lot of the time hour to hour. On weekends I just try to get myself to "The Good Wife" so I can watch TV and go to bed and on weekdays it is just get through the workday and most days I DO NOT succeed so I leave early sometimes very early like still in the morning and go home and crawl into bed and cry or sleep.

Every single day is so hard while the world around me moves on.

And of course, tonight, "The Good Wife" isn't even on... preempted by an awards show.

It hasn't resurfaced since I've posted this and I've resisted the urge to go poking for it.

I am really struggling though. I went to a support group on Friday and again last night and there's one tonight i'm tgying to judge if it is too far away.

I hope you were able to get to the group.

(((((((Dexter)))))))

I ended up too tired to travel there safely on Tuesday but I did get back to the one on Friday. I've been trying to go outside for walks, today I have just been in bed all day and very tired right now.

Hang on in there I will be thinking of you.

Thank you Fizzyo I am having another really rough weekend I don't know how I am getting through these usccessfully.