[little turtle]

please follow along with me on anger and depression here...
this is a very dangerous subject but must be talked about..
I think that anger kills...it kills us

[Skeezyks]

The Skeezyks harbors a lot of anger... mostly, but not entirely, directly inward...

[Fuzzybear]

[little turtle]

Originally Posted by Skeezyks

The Skeezyks harbors a lot of anger... mostly, but not entirely, directly inward...

this inward anger....what is this anger about...I am trying to look at why I am angry at myself...do I feel guilt...am I ashamed about being mentally ill...am I feeling cowardly that I don't speak up more about my illness...what is going on...can anyone here talk about this...I really don't understand

I do understand my anger at others...I cant stand people who abuse and harm and cheat others...it makes me furious...I have a mood disorder...that is the truth

[guiltier65]

I feel anger and self loathing on so many fronts. I am angry that I struggle so much to get through each day and no one gets it. I have cut so many people out of my life for fear of hurting them in my anger. Now I am angry because I am alone with my pain/despair. I think anger/depression/guilt/shame all get wrapped up together and cause so much grief/pain.

[little turtle]

Originally Posted by guiltier65

I feel anger and self loathing on so many fronts. I am angry that I struggle so much to get through each day and no one gets it. I have cut so many people out of my life for fear of hurting them in my anger. Now I am angry because I am alone with my pain/despair. I think anger/depression/guilt/shame all get wrapped up together and cause so much grief/pain.

I feel guilty for not telling my patients that I was breaking down...I told them I was going into research....I was mentally ill and I should have talked with them and explained what was happening...I was so ashamed...I feel guilty about that...

I cut important people out of my life, but I discovered some had stood by me anyway all the time.

[PumpkinPieHead]

I'm one of those irritable folks. I hate it. Antidepressants helped but I got off of them because I was a zombie, completely devoid of personality. I'm thinking about trying them again though, as the anger is becoming unbearable and St. John's Wort is just not cutting it.

[eversad]

The anger could be at yourself, or the world for being so unfair, others for hurting you, and that mixed with depression ad low self-esteem means irritability. Doctors usually look out for anger as a sign of depression because its an emotion (as well as sadness) that is so prevalent in depression victims. It's sometimes hard to tell where the anger comes from. That's the dangerous part

[little turtle]

I am very angry at my wife...it is a chronic thing...it causes me a lot of depression and sadness...I am learning to be very careful what comes out of my mouth...my mouth..
so in order to prevent more depression I need to not do things that I feel are wrong..i don't want to feel guilty...she does plenty of nasty things...but I need to care for me now..

[Apanthropos]

It does kill us. But we can learn things from anger and depression. Figure out things about ourselves we never thought we knew before.

[nomdeplume83]

Originally Posted by PumpkinPieHead

I'm one of those irritable folks. I hate it. Antidepressants helped but I got off of them because I was a zombie, completely devoid of personality. I'm thinking about trying them again though, as the anger is becoming unbearable and St. John's Wort is just not cutting it.

I had this problem since I started taking anti-depressants. I got off of the meds on two different occasions because of this only to find that my emotions were too overwhelming. My pdoc switched me to Lexapro last year which increased the zombie feeling. Eventually, I couldn't deal with it anymore, so she added Wellbutrin XL. The lower dose helped initially and then seemed to stop working, so we went up to 300 mg which helped tremendously.

This is the best combo I've been on to date. I still lack emotion, which I like, but I'm not sitting around on the couch staring at the wall. I'm active and getting things done. I still have my bouts where the depression sweeps over me like a dark cloud - I feel hopeless, lethargic, unable and unwilling to fight any longer. But I always come out of it and these moments don't happen as frequently as they used to - I'll take that over the alternative.

The point of all this rambling is to keep at it. Work with your doctor to try it different combinations.

[boomerango]

Anger has so many forms... there is the raging violent form of my mother's against her children. Yes, that anger nearly killed us children! There is anger over social injustice, and that may motivate beneficial change. There is self-loathing, another killer. If all anger comes from pain, and forgiveness heals, how to forgive? My struggle is with forgiveness, and mostly self-forgiveness. And-- I've always been afraid of anger.