Reframing

In all the years I was "in" therapy, the t didn't model or teach reframing, or anything much of use

I digress

I wonder if for every negative self blaming thought, we could reframe it. I know this isn't new... I think it can be helpful.

Please forgive me if I "use" any of your words, they are just examples. I can delete this post if wanted.

Instead of "I'm a failure" -(global labelling)
something I read somewhere - a failure isn't always a mistake, sometimes it's the best we can do at the time

(This might help lesson some of the poisonous thoughts like "I'm a mistake" I get these.

This isn't about "coping" or even about "recovering" - it's a journey, for some, it will be for life, with many detours

Instead of "I'm an anxious and depressed, rudderless person (labelling)

I'm anxious and depressed, sometimes I feel lost...

Any thoughts or input?

PS spelling

lesson - lessen

I make mitsakes (I'm human)

PS.. I wish I could take my own advice..

Thanks for this, Fuzzy. Depression is an all-or-nothing, glass half empty mindset. I have the "I am a failure" tape running most of the time. I overlook the ways that I have succeeded and do succeed in supporting a family, raising children, being a father, keeping a house, paying bills, etc. My career has gone down a rabbit hole, but I am more than my career. And I have had some career successes along the way (not in a while, though). I guess every day can have its little successes.

That **** t often used labelling so I have to challenge his mean words and projections also

"You're a very anxious.....(bleep. Deleted). Woman "

Well at least he got my gender right

When I think about it, nearly all his "clients" were "young, attractive women" aged about 20 to 40. I wonder why

I think "success" is definitely an issue of perspective...


Personally, I wouldn't judge anyone as a "failure".

Judge not

And yet we judge ourselves so harshly

This is a very good idea and appreciate it, really. I used to change the verbs. For example instead of "to be" I used "to behave", particularly about children. And I avoided using adverbs like "always" or "never". Instead, I used "sometimes". This was when I worked as school advisor working with children with disabilities not to label them. I refused to use labels. I used to describe their behavior and processes and focus more on the environment (how the environment could be more helpful to all children to develop). Of course, I met a lot of resistance. Unfortunately, pedagogy, psychology, and psychiatry are often tools to punish individuals that "deviate" from the "norm"

Ah Fuzzybear you are quoting me my own words. But, alas you have a point. I'd like to think of it as a journey. A trek as it were. This trek has an unknown destination and it's final outcome could be the pits of despair and hell. Despite all my protestations in the various posts I've made I have learned quite a bit and tried to impart that wisdom to others. Hercule appreciates many of the things he has seen and learned over time. Much of it beauty much of it ugly. Hercule though is tired. The path each day becomes more overgrown with weeds and the ground thick with mud. To trod on such a path day to day is a Herculean task. The way ahead is laden with dark clouds and the rumble of thunder. The curtain it will be drawn and then Hercule can lie down to sleep and, perchance to dream.

This sounds a lot like how I've been feeling lately -Fuzzybear too is very tired I do each day appreciate the journey despite the weeds, brambles and overgrown trees (and yes mud, so much mud - although sometimes mud can be good to play in, for bears... I wonder when my metamorphosis, into a bear, will be complete )

(((((((((( Clara ))))))))))
You're such a kind and gentle soul, I'm honoured to be sharing this journey with you

Fuzzy,
You are a gift to me and everyone here
Thank you for being here

((((((((((( Clara ))))))))))))
the same is true of you, dear person, thank you for spreading love here
(I wanted to send more hearts, it wouldn't let me :crazy face: :-) )