Entering the blues

I posted elsewhere about my lithium related illness. The short version of the story is that it could be very serious

I've been stressing heavily on this for days. But now I am starting to feel alone. Depession won't be far behind.

I am in a great relationship. But it is long distance making this time more difficult than it should be. My boyfriend is doing his best to be supportive. But...

It is not just me that needs his emotional help. About the same time I learned of my own health crisis his daughter (not even 35) had what appears to have been a massive stroke. He is fortunately able to visit her daily and support her as she tries to recover.

He is going through hell. I am doing my best to remain level headed and be the support he needs too all the while I am terrified about what news awaits me when I see the kidney specialist at month's end.

I feel pulled. I feel a little forgotten. I feel angry at myself for feeling this way; because I understand it is not just about me right now.

I feel myself start to slip away into that horrid state of misery I fear so very much.

Go easier on yourself. You both are going through extreme stress. It is just not going to be easy for a while. I hope that the news about your kidneys is not bad. I know that is very serious business so of course you are out of your mind. Please let us know if it turns out OK.

It's ok.. you're just stressed over this.. it's normal, even if it IS painful but it's not your fault. Fingers crossed, and I wish you good luck

thank you