I'm better......

.......or at least that's what most everyone thinks. Truth is the mask I was wearing that was hiding what I was really feeling broke. Now I've gotten a new mask and everyone thinks I'm ok now. Truth is I feel worse now than ever. Think of suicide everyday. Some days I think of it more and some days the desire is stronger than other but it is always there. Much like a bad cut on your hand. Just because it doesn't hurt as bad today as it did yesterday doesn't mean that it's better. Just because I have it covered up now where you can't see it doesn't mean it has healed. I broke down and people caught a glimpse of what I'm going through. Those who got a close look it scared the hell out of them. Welcome to my life. Regardless of what some say I've dealt with this as long as I can remember. When I was a kid they didn't want to diagnose kids with depression or other mental illnesses such as that. So I eventually got very good at hiding it.

Please hang in there! It's actually ok to feel sad, take it easy on yourself! You're already trying so hard...

I got a new mask, too. All nice and shiny; the people love it.

Just like you said for me, I'm here whenever you need to talk.

I'm really sorry you're feeling this way..

Remember that you have us!

I read your Dr. experience. I'm sorry that happened to you. There are good Drs. out there. I have one who is working with me and my depression is getting better with anti-depressants. I don't feel suicidal anymore. I hope you find a way to feel better too.

I get it.. you can pm me any time ..

Yeah.. doctors... meds and masks..