[jjgbirder]

Does anyone know anything about the relationship between depression, anxiety, and taking responsibility for one's actions?

When I make a mistake, sometimes I feel like it was my own irresponsibility that caused the mistake. I know this is not always the case, often there are multiple factors at play. However, I have made some decisions in my life that I regret.

When I do make a mistake regarding something I was responsible for, I have a hard time addressing it with those that it effects. I don't lie or cover up, but I have a difficult time handling my emotions (especially feelings of disappointment / fear). I end up getting depressed / anxious / and am hard on myself for not being more careful or thinking things through better.

As I've gotten older (26) I'm seeing aspects of my personality that concern me: impatience with "life", difficulty with stressful situations, complaining when I'm actually probably anxious or fearful of something, taking the "easy way" when stressed, tired, maybe overconfidence (?)... I don't know, I feel like I could list several flaws here (and examples).

How do others handle this and are these thoughts / behaviors typical of someone with depression / anxiety?

(P.S. I'm also going to bring this up with my counselor)

[hopeless2015]

This is something my therapist really helped me with...she moved to another town so I don't see her now but she was a big help. She worked with me on goal setting and taking things one at a time. I would get overwhelmed with things and do nothing at all. I let all of my responsibilities go and things got really bad. She also worked with me on seeing positives when I made changes instead of just looking at what I still needed to do and beating myself up. I also would spend money impulsively and get myself in trouble financially and that's something she helped me with to. I had a terrible gambling habit that ended up sending me into bankruptcy...that and having unpaid time from work. Talk openly with your counselor and hopefully they can help you work through this. Depression and anxiety lie to us and keep us from living our lives. Keep reaching out for help. Hugs to you!

[Fizzyo]

Therapy can help a lot with managing your feelings and the way you think about mistakes.
We generally tend to be much harder on ourselves than we would with anyone else and expect the world to do the same.

If you don't have access to therapy you may find this link interesting, it helps us work on how we think and feel about ourselves and our situations.
https://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome

I found it helpful even though I'm a lot older than the target client group for the site.

For me self-forgiveness is a big thing that helps.

We are all human, and we all make mistakes on a daily basis. Really, its ok!

I think what matters most is how we behave after we make a mistake. Do we try and fix what we have done? (If we can.) Do we apologize to someone if the mistake affected them? (If its that kind of mistake.)

You can tell yourself "next time I'll try to be more careful so that I don't make the same mistake twice" and then work on improving.

I don't think any good can come of raking ourselves over the coals when we do something wrong. (I tend to do this myself.) I think self forgiveness is a big part of getting through these feelings and moving forward.