[introspectiveme]

I wish I had self confidence. I wish I didn't care so much about what other people think of me. There are people who don't really care about other peoples' opinions, especially negative opinions. I don't know what I can do to be more like them.

[MickeyCheeky]

People can change although that's not easy. But it is possible I also think you should accept yourself as you are..

You can have self confidence though… Accept yourself for who you are… just be the best you can be as yourself. Tip: Don't go out of your way just to please everyone… (some people just aren't worth it.) Also most people are more worried about themselves (how they look, dress, smell, etc…) than pay much attention to you… kinda sad but true. So don't worry much about that.

[introspectiveme]

Thank you both. I try to tell myself that people are more worried about themselves but it only rarely works. I know this is true, but why can't I accept it? I want to change because I think it would make me feel better.

To build self confidence might be hard work, but the reward will probably be high.

https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk//compassion.htm

https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk//socialanxiety.htm

https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk//unhelpful.htm

Good luck in building your self confidence! Remember there are always set backs on the road forward, but every time we rise up we are on the good path again... Things take time, but as long as we do not give up, every small step we take points to a better future ...

[introspectiveme]

Originally Posted by Singer47

To build self confidence might be hard work, but the reward will probably be high.

https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk//compassion.htm

https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk//socialanxiety.htm

https://www.getselfhelp.co.uk//unhelpful.htm

Good luck in building your self confidence! Remember there are always set backs on the road forward, but every time we rise up we are on the good path again... Things take time, but as long as we do not give up, every small step we take points forward ...

Thank you so much, I will go through your links.

I used to have bad social anxiety and care a lot about what people thought of me. Then one day I just decided it was too much effort and I didn't want to be that way any more. I currently have blue hair, piercings, tattoos and am a mother. People stare at me when I drop my kids at school and though I notice I do not care.

I just want you to know that it is possible to change. Not easy, but possible.

[introspectiveme]

Originally Posted by TheSadGirl

I used to have bad social anxiety and care a lot about what people thought of me. Then one day I just decided it was too much effort and I didn't want to be that way any more. I currently have blue hair, piercings, tattoos and am a mother. People stare at me when I drop my kids at school and though I notice I do not care.

I just want you to know that it is possible to change. Not easy, but possible.

Thank you for sharing your story. I can imagine it took you a long time to change.

[Fuzzybear]

[imaginethat]

Originally Posted by introspectiveme

Thank you both. I try to tell myself that people are more worried about themselves but it only rarely works. I know this is true, but why can't I accept it? I want to change because I think it would make me feel better.

This sounds so familiar, I could have written it. Of course, that fact doesn't help you.

One thing that might help is to lower your expectations of yourself. Are you a perfectionist? If you're like me, you have control issues. I want everyone to like me, but they're not going to just like I don't like everyone. It's hard to accept, but it's worth trying.

In some book, I read "Reduce the excessive demand you make of life and people in general." It helps me to read that quote.

[introspectiveme]

Originally Posted by imaginethat

This sounds so familiar, I could have written it. Of course, that fact doesn't help you.

One thing that might help is to lower your expectations of yourself. Are you a perfectionist? If you're like me, you have control issues. I want everyone to like me, but they're not going to just like I don't like everyone. It's hard to accept, but it's worth trying.

In some book, I read "Reduce the excessive demand you make of life and people in general." It helps me to read that quote.

Yes. I would say I am a perfectionist and have control issues too.

Your post makes so much sense. I want people to like me, but it doesn't always work. This makes me feel like I am not in control of things. I try to tell myself that I can't control other peoples' emotions or opinions of me.... like that movie Bruce Almighty.

Thanks for your post.