[Clarinets21]

I’m new here and need to express some issues about myself. I’ve had problems with putting my upbringing behind me. Here goes.... My mother never took good care of me while I was growing up. She did several things;

1) Left me waiting after for 45 minutes alone to be picked up. I was frustrated upset and pissed off about this! I could have been kidnapped. She also made me late going to school because she would yell at herself in the bathroom for 1/2 an hour!

2) Double standard rules for the family. When she wanted things done by us she expected it right away but when we wanted things done by her we had to wait a long time such as dinner. She never allowed my dad and I to help clean but when she wanted it done it was now! It had to be done a certain way! Very upset! Several times she broke drinking glasses and got angry because the dishes were not put away correctly nor done right!

3) She tried to smother with a pillow a few times growing up!

4) When I went to college she demanded for me to call her once a week and when she did not get it she would call multiple times and yell on the phone.

5) She expected me to live with her for the rest of her life!

I was so frustrated that she never let me grow up! I know she was raped and assisted by my grandfather but that is still no reason to take it out on me! Btw my father of Chinese decent got upset and smacked me up the neck for not getting the homework right. My mother was German Italian. Gratefully and happily my mother is now dead! No one has to deal with her anymore!!

Currently I’m in my second career as a nurse assistant in my second career. BA Music University if california Santa Cruz! I live on my own! Any advice here on how to cope with this or say forget it?

[Skeezyks]

Here are links to some articles, from PsychCentral's archives, on the subject of how to let go of a painful past, the first by our host Dr. John Grohol, Psy.D.:

Learning to Let Go of Past Hurts: 5 Ways to Move On

Letting Go of the Past: Why Memories Remain Painful Over Time

Healing Wounds of the Past | Adventures in Mind, Body, and Soul

How to Cope with Pain from the Past

A Simple Strategy to Let Go of Painful Thoughts and Feelings | Dialectical Behavior Therapy Understood

https://psychcentral.com/blog/7-ways-to-let-go/

I wish you well...