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Junior Member
Member Since Jul 2004
Location: Wild West
Posts: 13
20 |
#1
Even when, or especially when, it's NOT your fault?
How do you stop taking it out on yourself? How can you simply move on, or take responsibility without blaming yourself, and move on? How do you overcome being seemingly emotionally paralized by stress... even though it really wasn't your fault? |
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Grand Member
Member Since May 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 597
20 |
#2
The one thing I've learn is that, it really doesn't matter that much who's falt is it anyway. What matters the most is, what can I do to prevent it from happening again.
I do tend to blame myself for a lot of things, but I always tell myself: How much time do I want to waist putting blame on me instead of learning or figuring out what I need to do to prevent it from happening again? IT TRULLY DOESN'T MATTER WHO'S FAULT IT IS. I just think about what I need to do different the next time around. gab __________________ gab |
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Grand Member
Member Since Mar 2004
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 861
20 |
#3
Misty,
I too seem to blame myself for everything even when it is not my fault. I tend to find myself apologizing and feeling guilty for every bad thing that happens to everyone that I know. I have yet to find a way to stop it, but I agree with Ozzie. If you have a T then this should be something to talk to he/she about. I wish you the best of luck. Jessica <font color=blue> You are in this snowglobe. It is encovered in glass and secure. But one day someone comes and shakes the globe and the pieces go flying everywhere. Now they will eventually settle but they won't be the way they were before and they can never be that way again. </font color=blue> __________________ "Though she knows well he doesn't listen. There's still a hope in her he might." |
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Junior Member
Member Since Jul 2004
Location: Wild West
Posts: 13
20 |
#4
<What matters the most is, what can I do to prevent it from happening again.>
Yes, I can see that.. very true. Unfortunately, I have made the same mistake more than once... seems I'm not learning my lesson easily. What I'm talking about is learning to trust my instincts, and learning to take care of myself first. |
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Junior Member
Member Since Jul 2004
Location: Wild West
Posts: 13
20 |
#5
Yes, I've done that too, took "blame" for things far away and not pertinent to my life (like, if I only won a Nobel price I'd solve world hunger!)
I have a therapist but no $$ to see him regularly. |
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Grand Member
Member Since May 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 597
20 |
#6
I don't know how to take care of myself first either. My t sais that I put everybody feelings before mine, so, I'm working at it too.
I just try to to worry too much about who's fault is it, just try to change my behavior. Still working at it do... gab __________________ gab |
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Member
Member Since Jul 2004
Posts: 21
20 |
#7
I even blame myself that I blame myself
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