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Default May 26, 2021 at 10:07 PM
  #361
I was feeling overwhelmed by a new 3-month project. My first milestone is in 3 weeks. I had to be organized today and felt depressed because I wasn't. I was starting to have really dark depression. But I'm doing better now. I did some research and I think I am better prepared now for my first goal.

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Default May 26, 2021 at 10:20 PM
  #362
I was depressed for a while today, but I ended up saying the right things to myself & started feeling better.

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Default May 27, 2021 at 02:16 AM
  #363
I had a good cry last night. Deep down, I have sadness and worry about a family member because of what they have gone through and because I know their life is not easy. I was mostly there for them but also failed them at many critical junctions. Things have gotten better for them but I pray everyday that they will find a way to do more than just barely make it in this world. I pray that they can find peace and purpose--isn't that what so many of us who are depressed need?
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Default May 27, 2021 at 10:12 PM
  #364
I feel really lost and sad tonight. I am overwhelmed but I have no energy or motivation to take care of anything. I just want to sleep but sleep is never peaceful. I toss and turn and stress. When I wake I I wish I would never wake up. I don't want to face my life. It's filled with pain and doctor appointments. I am tired all the time. I am lonely I have people I talk to about relationships but it's never gonna go anywhere. Diabetes has ruined my life. I have terrible issues and can't lead a normal life. No one would ever want me.

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Heart May 28, 2021 at 11:02 AM
  #365
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deilla View Post
I feel really lost and sad tonight. I am overwhelmed but I have no energy or motivation to take care of anything. I just want to sleep but sleep is never peaceful. I toss and turn and stress. When I wake I I wish I would never wake up. I don't want to face my life. It's filled with pain and doctor appointments. I am tired all the time. I am lonely I have people I talk to about relationships but it's never gonna go anywhere. Diabetes has ruined my life. I have terrible issues and can't lead a normal life. No one would ever want me.
Things are going to get better later on! Please hang in there, @Deilla! You are loved here!

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Default May 29, 2021 at 07:04 PM
  #366
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I feel really lost and sad tonight. I am overwhelmed but I have no energy or motivation to take care of anything. I just want to sleep but sleep is never peaceful. I toss and turn and stress. When I wake I I wish I would never wake up. I don't want to face my life. It's filled with pain and doctor appointments. I am tired all the time. I am lonely I have people I talk to about relationships but it's never gonna go anywhere. Diabetes has ruined my life. I have terrible issues and can't lead a normal life. No one would ever want me.

I’m sorry

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Default May 29, 2021 at 07:06 PM
  #367
I know I am struggling with a major depression. I don’t like my job and I don’t like my boyfriend’s lifestyle or living situation.

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Default Jun 01, 2021 at 03:36 PM
  #368
It's a boring day today (for me.) It was so boring I spent a large chunk of it replying to threads in the Games forum and in so doing I passed 29,000 posts. Whoopie!

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Default Jun 01, 2021 at 05:55 PM
  #369
I'm dating someone and they don't feel comfortable enough messaging me during the day. They worry about disturbing me. I tried to explain that I want to hear from them. It didn't make a difference. So I feel really sad.

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Default Jun 10, 2021 at 10:59 PM
  #370
I'm feeling rather mad at life, and I have complained quite a bit lately. I just hate that damn riding mower. It's close to starting and won't start no matter what I do. I added fresh gasoline and used starter fluid and it still wouldn't start up well. Plus, now I'll have to get someone to repair the washing machine too because the light was blinking and it wasn't moving through the cycle and it wouldn't drain or spin. I'm fairly sure there are several problems with that thing. I won't trust it at all till someone can make it work right like it's supposed to. I never have trusted machines that might lock your clothes in. They're just crummy. Mother had to reset the damn washer just to get our clothes out. It's like life is reminding me that I can't have everything. It's like one joke of a life.
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Default Jun 10, 2021 at 11:06 PM
  #371
I just kind of hate life. It seems like some of us have such bad luck. Here my riding mower doesn't work. lucky I have a push mower that I trust so much better. I don't trust a lot of riding mowers at all. Now the washing machine needs fixing too and I will have to try to get it fixed asap. It seems like I have complained quite a bit in the past week or two with me seeing hardly any hope. I just got through yelling at mother telling her she just won't get her damn clothes washed unless she gets someone to fix it for her. I meant it too and she just turned on me. I couldn't blame her. I just feel like It seems like my sense of happiness and contentment just isn't meant to last. laughs. I have seen spring or summer as the bad luck season. laughs. Maybe I'll change my mind one of these days. I'm lucky to have anything work out for me at all. I just feel like giving in. I'm just recovering from the stress I experienced trying to get the clothes out of the washer. My mood is rather dark as of present.
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Default Jun 10, 2021 at 11:28 PM
  #372
I feel a deep sense of guilt for complaining and yelling. Now I feel like crap and I feel like I don't care to reach out to anyone because why would they want to hear any more bad news from me. I just feel like disappearing and like escaping at a time like this. I try to stay calm but it seems like life is hell bent on making me upset. So I'm now having to distract myself with a book or something. I don't know why I'm writing this. I feel like a complaining mess and I'm forcing myself to find some solution to the problem instead of aggravating it more. It makes me wish my damned mind would be reasonable for once.
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Heart Jun 11, 2021 at 02:20 AM
  #373
Complain all you want here, @modestlychee6463, this is a vent room. Maybe your riding mower just needs spark plugs & won't cost very much. Anyway, good luck with everything!

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Default Jun 11, 2021 at 09:29 AM
  #374
Thanks for your support. That's probably it.
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Default Jun 11, 2021 at 09:39 AM
  #375
It’s been really rough these past few weeks. I’ve been acting very erratic and doing crazy things. To be clear, I’m not a harm to myself or others – but have caused myself a substantial amount of distress and hardship by acting out the way I have. I’m doing better these last few days, but it just seems it’s gets harder to deal with myself every day.
Also, any suggestions of how to overcome negative experiences trying to open up or converse with others in such a fashion as a forum? My past experience paints this dynamic very poorly, but I come back to the idea of it because I feel the benefits may outweigh the negative experiences and emotions I’ve had/have.
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Default Jun 11, 2021 at 09:42 AM
  #376
Like I said, I might as well try not to think about what is going wrong for me. It's no use even thinking about it unless I'm able to do something about it if you get me. Sure I can think of a ton of things of what could be wrong with my washing machine and riding mower but still thinking about the problem won't fix it. It's getting to that solution. That's what is the hardest. So I have stopped wanting to even care about it. I might sell that mower if I'm not able to do anything about it.
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Default Jun 11, 2021 at 10:02 AM
  #377
In a twisted sense, I'm glad this brother of mine will have to take his clothes to get them washed elsewhere if the machine isn't running right now. laughs. He'll have to suffer too like I have to since he doesn't care at all about my feelings.
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Default Jun 11, 2021 at 10:04 AM
  #378
Hi, @WindsThatBlow! Thank you for what you posted in the vent room. And I wanted you to know that I have a hard time opening up, too. Also welcome to these forums!

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Default Jun 12, 2021 at 10:06 PM
  #379
I'm all alone. I have no one now. I'm sad and feel like a failure. I can't do anything right. I'm failing in all areas of my life. Nothing is going right for me.

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Heart Jun 12, 2021 at 11:22 PM
  #380
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I'm all alone. I have no one now. I'm sad and feel like a failure. I can't do anything right. I'm failing in all areas of my life. Nothing is going right for me.
Dear @Deilla, I know you're hurting terribly. Maybe you're trying to do too much lately?, appointments, chores, etc.? And you expect too much from yourself? Whatever it is, you have a lot of talent, & from my point of view, are one of the best people on our planet. And the pandemic is just too much. But up ahead are better days. Meanwhile, we have these forums & friends here. Hugs & love to you, dear friend!!

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