[MimiBhaduri0]

I am struggling, in a lot of physical pain, my muscles are not working properly so that I cannot get up and do stuff. My whole body feels so heavy. Also getting panic attacks from time to time. I feel overwhelmed.
I hope some day soon I can get out of India and get back to usa, my homeland, again, where I will be safe and happy.

[will19]

I woke up feeling very depressed. It's about the job (in which I'll post later on the
Work & Careers like I have been lately). I made a little bit of a dent at work yesterday. I wanted to post on there last night but I was too tired to. I'll do it later on today.

I felt depressed about the job and what I'm going to do in the future. And then I'm thinking that I may have put a lot of my money into banks that may not be reputable. My mind works that way! Also, and now, I wanted to do the laundry when I first got up (around 6:45) but the laundry room is completely taken by someone who is going to use it for three hours. I hate it when she uses the laundry room at that time.

[Rose76]

Have done nothing all day, but look at phone. But yesterday was decent day, and I got stuff done. It gave me hope.

[MimiBhaduri0]

Was feeling horrible after waking up in the morning - pain in my legs, pain in my nose, eyes and teeth and asthma atack. Now a lot better. I have made a to-do list for the day. Hope to be able to carry out the tasks by the end of the day. Feeling lazy atm, I will have to push myself to do them.

[MimiBhaduri0]

It is afternoon, after 2pm and I still don't feel like doing anything. Feeling sick and too low on energy.

[Deilla]

I'm doing well this morning. I've been playing with the cats and doing some reading.

[will19]

It was a pretty good day for me. I didn't do much this morning, but it was very nice that way. My sister called and it went pretty good. Took a three hour bike ride. Nothing much else to report about.

[Deilla]

I feel very sad this morning. Yesterday my mom said some stuff to me that really hurt. She was very hateful. It still hurts today. I am going to withdraw. I think I need to change my AD too. I'm pretty much always depressed.

[MimiBhaduri0]

The day ended in my doing deliberate self-harm. I really wish to die. I can't go on any more.

[Mountaindewed]

My depression is really bad today. I finally took all my night meds and 1mil of Xanax and 2 sleeping pills. I’m hoping to be able to get some relief soon and sleep this off and then hopefully tomorrow I’ll feel better because I have therapy.

I just can’t stay in this town anymore. Moving will literally save my life.

I think this may also be the last of my PMS.

[will19]

It was fairly busy today at work, especially considering that the place is almost all empty. I had a staff meeting this morning and really opened up about my concerns. It's the first time I have ever opened up at those meetings. I got a lot off my chest but I felt like I didn't make a very good impression. If I didn't make a good impression, then so be it. It's going to end sooner or later.

I'm feeling like that so much is whirling in my mind, so I'm feeling pretty depressed. Today was an alright kind of day. But these days, there would be an occasional pretty good day over many not so good ones.

[Deilla]

These last couple of days have been okay. I'm hopeful for tomorrow.

[Breaking Dawn]

Mostly downs lately. I can't destress. The milk isn't working & likewise with other remedies.

[Deilla]

Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn

Mostly downs lately. I can't destress. The milk isn't working & likewise with other remedies.

@Breaking Dawn I'm sorry you're struggling. I hope you can find something that does work. I'll send you some positive vibes for a good solution.

[MimiBhaduri0]

Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn

Mostly downs lately. I can't destress. The milk isn't working & likewise with other remedies.

Hugs. Hope you feel better soon.

[will19]

The number of people at my job are still dwindling, despite that there were not that many working at the site for last few months. I heard that there were some layoffs. The ones that were let go were working at home. They came to the site to clean out their working areas.

One guy at work told me that I'm staying on. I don't know how he knows that. Other people at where I work are very critical of him. I guess I know why.

Emotionally it's like a roller coaster game for me. I've been set in my mind that I'm going to have some good amount of paid time off and looking forward to it. And then I get depressed when being told that I will still be working when I feel like it doesn't interest me. So this saga keeps going on with no real end in sight.

[Rose76]

No motivation. I think about getting a dog. Don't really want the added responsibility.

[Deilla]

I'm struggling today.

[Breaking Dawn]

It's been down & now I seem to be moving upward.

[will19]

I got out of bed about 45 to 60 minutes earlier this morning than I usually do on Saturdays. Since I woke up early and couldn't get back to sleep, I decided to do the laundry. It was a sure bet that the laundry room was very available for me. As it turned out, no one had used the laundry room all morning. It's a 50/50 chance that it goes that way. It was nice that my laundry got completed early and no delays.

I Went out shopping and the traffic was awful. Very heavy traffic that I had never seen before. I guess it was because of various construction sites in the area. There were some detours. It's going to be worse in the future, as of right now, there are two high-rises going up right near me.

I'm feeling alright for now, which is a bit of a surprise for me. Around now I would feel dread in going to work on Monday. I feel a little bit better about it now since it's very much winding down. But I still don't know what's going to happen for me.