I don't like it.

someone had it as an idea that if I had one, with all it's baby things, I would feel warm and comforted (childhood stuff around me), but I don't like her

I was given her almost a week ago, and that was also the only day I held her- to show the person I liked it

but all she does is cry, and her head doesn't even feel like a babie's head- it's all plastic and horrible

she comes with a passifier, too, and a baby bottle, but she doesn't make the relevant sounds when you use the items.

I don't know. I'm not sure if I'm depressed because she's just a dolly (and nothing more), or I'm depressed because the accessories (passifier, baby bottle,) arn't full sized ones- but dolly sized. I think I wanted them individual so I could put them in a box.

and now their's the question of what to do with the baby dolly. I don't want her, but I don't want to hurt her because she's a baby (plastic one, I know) I need to get a grip, injuring plastic?

[Skeezyks]

I'm sorry you don't like your baby dolly. I have a 24" teddy bear I bought a few weeks ago from Vermont Teddy Bears. I hold him in the morning while I drink my tea and during the evening when we (typically) watch one of the free movies that are on YouTube. Often I'll bring him back to bed with me after I've gotten up, during the night, to go pee. I hold him with his back against my chest and it's really comforting. I tend to have a lot of physical anxiety-like feelings in my body, especially when I'm awake during the night. And holding my teddy bear close is a comfort... more-so than I even realized it would be when I bought him.

[Angelique67]

I'm sorry, raging vortex. I also have been meaning to get a new plushie but I guess I didn't plan to yet. There's a woman here (in the nursing home) who has a few baby dollies, like infant aged. She always walks around with the dollies in baby clothes or swaddled in blankets. They look really realistic. She just received another one about a week ago.

I'm not sure if I want a teddy bear. Maybe I'd rather have one that resembles the plushie I had when I was little. I used to say I was going to marry him when I grew up. Unfortunately I don't have him anymore. I have a sort of smaller one but I don't know where it is.

Originally Posted by Skeezyks

I'm sorry you don't like your baby dolly. I have a 24" teddy bear I bought a few weeks ago from Vermont Teddy Bears. I hold him in the morning while I drink my tea and during the evening when we (typically) watch one of the free movies that are on YouTube. Often I'll bring him back to bed with me after I've gotten up, during the night, to go pee. I hold him with his back against my chest and it's really comforting. I tend to have a lot of physical anxiety-like feelings in my body, especially when I'm awake during the night. And holding my teddy bear close is a comfort... more-so than I even realized it would be when I bought him.

it makes sense
bingo bear (a bear I had for years as a kid) was so special for me, he never left his special spot on the shelf, unless it was for me to hug him- I didn't want him broken, so much so I lied to my parents so I ddidn't have to take him to my school's teddybear's picnic.

he eventually lost his stuffing, but yeah. he lasted a good few years..

[MickeyCheeky]

So Sorry. Perhaps another baby doll may be more fitting if you Feel Comfortable with it? Sending many Safe, warm Hugs to BOTH you, @raging vortex, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

[Fuzzybear]

I'm sorry about this I have seen some very life like baby dolls online which I did not want as I felt they would be.... well, maybe triggering or something? I don't really have any suggestions but I'm sorry about this causing more pain for you. I wonder if you could give her away to someone? Or are you worried your friend might find out? Could you put her in a cupboard somewhere, with a small teddy maybe (to keep her ''company'') I also know how you feel about ''injuring plastic'' ) (I have been there ) (I've thrown a few things away....)

Maybe a different baby dolly might be better for you as MickeyCheeky suggested? It's ok not to like everything someone gives us even something as personal (for want of a ''better'' word ) as a baby dolly I think I can understand how disappointing and sad this has been for you, I would have felt bad about it too

Hugs and respect to you!

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I don't like it.

someone had it as an idea that if I had one, with all it's baby things, I would feel warm and comforted (childhood stuff around me), but I don't like her

I was given her almost a week ago, and that was also the only day I held her- to show the person I liked it

but all she does is cry, and her head doesn't even feel like a babie's head- it's all plastic and horrible

she comes with a passifier, too, and a baby bottle, but she doesn't make the relevant sounds when you use the items.

I don't know. I'm not sure if I'm depressed because she's just a dolly (and nothing more), or I'm depressed because the accessories (passifier, baby bottle,) arn't full sized ones- but dolly sized. I think I wanted them individual so I could put them in a box.

and now their's the question of what to do with the baby dolly. I don't want her, but I don't want to hurt her because she's a baby (plastic one, I know) I need to get a grip, injuring plastic?

I know how you feel. theres this weird thing that goes on. When I first was diagnosed with certain mental problems the in thing was for people to recommend things like go get your self a dolly, buy your insiders toys, get them dollies it will comfort them.

what they dont realize is adult brains are different than a childs brain. same gray mass but the pathways are different. adults no longer are able to imagine to that satisfying realism that children do.

when we were children it was easy for us to use our imaginations and make believe our dollies were real even though they were just rubber and plastic, we could fully imagine back then taking care of dollies like real babies. when we imagined feeding and caring for those plastic and rubber dollies we had as children they were real to us.

but then over time our brains advanced and built new pathways. we no longer are able to satisfy ourselves with plastic and rubber dollies no matter how much "real baby" characteristics they may have. we buy them expecting the satisfying play like we did as children then disappointed they sit on shelves or in boxes,

why because we are not children we no longer have that ability to imagine realism like we did as children. we now have brain pathways built for adults not children, our brains pathways are now built from experiencing real life. we have witnessed first hand the realism of babies. some have actually given birth to children, some have relatives with children, some have been care takers of real not imagined children.

Im not saying its a great idea. but somewhere along the way it became the "in thing to do " by people with certain mental disorders. but what most dont understand is this originally was not something people with mental disorders did. it actually started not as a lets play dollies like we did as children but rather a therapy technique. a teaching tool. with out the therapy technique behind it, with out the teaching tools behind it, go buy a dolly and take care of it like a real baby is meaningless. and not satisfying. it becomes a disappointment instead of helpful.

its very popular on the internet for people in various PTSD, DID groups to suggest and want Dollies. But the reality is people go out, spend lots of money on their dollies and supplies then are heartbroken when its not comforting, not satisfying and ends up turned into an obligation to please others.

I gave up that obligation of buying dollies and baby supplies with in the first year of my diagnosis of DID.

a therapist once told me chasing shadows of the past doesnt work. nothing is going to satisfy my memories of the past of playing with dollies and stuffies. if I choose to buy them do it for the right reasons.. do it because those things actually bring me pleasure today. dont do it for satisfying imaginative play. Adult imaginative play is different that that of what we did as children, Im an adult and cant replicate my childhood, I will always be disappointed by trying to replicate the imaginative play of childhood.

that first year of being diagnosed I bought many dollies trying to satisfy that childhood imaginative bring dollies to realism play, I ended up with a box for of disappointments in the form of unplayed with dolls and doll supplies.

Finally I protected my dollies in a box and searched for just the right real child to hand them off to. As my relatives had children my dollies found new homes to be played with the way they were meant to be played with, by real life children with the imagination capabilities of children. The dolls that didnt find new homes went to programs that promote teaching children how to use imagination play like mental health agencies, preschools and headstart programs.

I turned my collecting away from dollies and baby things and I moved to what really did bring me and my adult mind with its adult pathways pleasure ... candles, candle making, making diaramas of nature ..sea shell curio boxes. and certain fabrics also bring me pleasure so I made a couple stuffed animals using those fabrics that bring me joy. when I hold them its not for holding and playing with a teddy. its because the fabric they are made of is a grounding tool. they are a patchwork of various fabric textures meant for grounding purposes. I was going to make a quilt but a teddy bear takes up less space lol

maybe you can look around, ask around to churches, schools, day cares, pre schools, head start programs where you can donate your unwanted dollies and supplies to.

maybe you can sit down and figure out what does bring you pleasure today. these are the things that you will enjoy collecting and in turn satisfy you and all parts of you.

[Fuzzybear]

Have you thought about buying a stuffed animal instead? I think they can be more comforting and, obviously, not as ''human'' looking which can be sub optimal for some people.