Have you ever been called to "needy", to 'sensitive', or to 'high maintenance'

I have by former friends when our friendship ended. They all knew that I have issues with anxiety and depression. Thee way they said it was insulting. If I was that bad, then why would they have ever been my friend at all?

I was made to feel that I should be grateful for whatever "crumbs" they choose to give me at times. I didn't think that I expected that much of them. I did always expect to be treated with kindness, respect, and consideration though.

Do people who don't have issues with anxiety and depression tend to see people like us as being not worthy of being treated with respect? It seems like it to me.

I don't think it's "needy" to want support when you really need it. I'd be there for my friends if they needed someone to listen to them.

I'm so sorry that people who were supposed to be your friends said such hurtful and insulting things. That can be painful if they were long-term friends.

I have been told that I am too sensitive and take things too personally. At the time, it was very invalidating. Thinking back on it now that time is passed, I realize the other person was a more self centered person than I thought at the time. It was said in a condescending and cruel way, and now I am so glad that person is no longer in my life.

I'm sorry for the hurt you are feeling. You deserve better!

I’ve been called too sensitive, and I’ve been told to not take it personally. The people who called me too sensitive behaved too insensitively towards me then said that to cut me off from taking issue with it. The person who said to not take it personally, said that about anyone’s behavior I took issue with. They’d always say it had nothing to do with me, no matter how I was treated by someone. This was their go-to saying about that. It’s hard for me to wrap my head around, that no matter how badly someone treats me, it has nothing to do with me.

I was first called too sensitive when I was bullied in elementary school. The bully girls retorted with that when I took issue with their bullying. There have only been a couple others who have also been nasty to me who then turned it around to call me too sensitive when I took issue with their behavior. Generally, no one calls me too sensitive!

My conclusion is it is a bully’s defense to say to someone, and it’s their bad, not yours.

Too high maintenance or needy means you require more than they are wanting to give. I was never called either of those. I have tried to get more from those closest to me, but they won’t give. No one has done any maintenance or satisfied needs. At least, if you are being told you are too needy, that person is making some effort to meet those needs. It may be you are asking for too high a demand than reasonable. You should examine what it is you are asking of that person and if you think it is a reasonable expectation or it should be adjusted.

I completely understand how you feel because I been called too needy and treated horrible. It made me questioning myself everyday. I wish I knew what and why people do this to those who have anxiety and depression and it not like we ask this to happen to us.

I understand how you are feeling because I had people who treated me like that to. Once they left? I realized how awful these people were. Expect me to be there for them but didn’t want to be there for me.

I’ve also been called too sensitive (by, you guessed it, bullying types... I can also echo Tisha’s experience of being told not to take things personally, when it was clear to me that it was personal). I agree people who say that, generally, don’t really care how they make others feel but also don’t like being called out on it.
I am sorry you weren’t treated well by your former friends, and I hope in future you will be able to find better people to hang out with.

I would say "sensitive". Some have called me that. There's a good reason I've been called that. Because I am very sensitive, though I think that not many have called me "sensitive" because I'm not outwardly emotional. It really sucks being like that, even though there are many articles online that say it can be a precious gift. I suppose it can be because being like that makes you more aware of things. But still, being that way brings me down a whole lot.

So Sorry that your Friends have told you those things! i am not sure or i don't remember if i have ever been called sensitive by anyone outside of my parents. However i think i have always thought of myself this way. i still do in fact. i do believe i am too sensitive and needy, that is why i often try to handle myself better with others. Please do not let these comments discourage you if possible Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @jesyka, your Family, your TRUE Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

If you have been called those things more than once by multiple people then there’s a good chance you need to work on this in therapy. Saying those people are mean isn’t going to change them. The only person you have control over is yourself. Staying the same doing the same things again and again expecting a different outcome is only going to lead to frustration.

Hi everyone, I thought that I replied to everyone on here awhile back, but I didn’t. I’m so sorry about that. I’m a very forgetful person. I think that I have memory issues. I need to write things down & I often misplace things too.

Anyways, thanks for your suggestions & sorry to hear about what some of you have been through.

I wouldn’t worry about being called needy by friends. Everyone is different and if someone says someone is too sensitive then maybe they’re rude or maybe not a good fit for a friend. In the past I’ve felt too needy and I’m not pushy about it so I just back off from the person.

I've been called a lot of things but eventually I just started ignoring them when I realized how ignorant and uncaring they are.

I agree with this. It's probably good to ignore any names someone tries to call you, it's like school yard bullying.

Good post, I agree