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Junior Member
Member Since Oct 2019
Location: wa
Posts: 18
4 3 hugs
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#1
I wish I knew how to help her and she doesn't think therapy would be effective. She says, "they're just gonna give me some DBT ******** and call it good." She says she feels like she's trapped. She's a single mom, barely affording her mortgage, trying to go through a divorce, and just had surgery on her arm (her dominant one), leaving her in a sling and only able to do things with her left arm right now. We've only been together a little over a year, and I pseudo moved in after she got her surgery, to help with kiddo and everything really. She's pretty uncomfortable and I know being in pain is spiraling everything. When she's in pain, she's quick to anger and then takes it out on myself and kiddo and then she feels bad she reacted that way. She then catastrophives EVERYTHING. she lives in a crappy neighborhood, with crappy neighbors and needs to move, the house needs repair, the car needs repair, etc, etc, and she can't do it all and goes down a deep hole and won't talk to me. She says the only thing that makes her feel better when she feels like that is imaging she's not here anymore, like not alive. She does not have a plan but simply does not see the point of living with all of life's BS on her back. The only thing I see as helpful is for her to talk to someone, but she doesn't think it'll help. The kicker is we both work in behavioral health!! And I feel she should understand that it's not normal or healthy to cry and feel hopeless as much as she does. She is the love of my life and I dont want to leave her, but I also feel like she's pushing me away. Please! Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated.
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FloatThruThis, mote.of.soul, T4bbyCat, unaluna
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Legendary
Member Since Jan 2018
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 13,126
(SuperPoster!)
6 21.9k hugs
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#2
Gosh, what a saddening situation you're both in, I do feel for you both...
It does sound like you're doing a lot to alleviate her sorrows already, so the only thing I can personally think of is; are you able to repair her car or buy her a new one? It's obviously a big ask but it's something I feel could lift her spirits. Sending good vibes to you guys.🙏🙏 __________________ "A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."- Dōgen
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