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Legendary
Breaking Dawn
Thankful for my blessings.
Member Since: Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 16,689
(SuperPoster!)
42.2k hugs
given |
#801
I feel sad to hear this, dear Buffy. They have something seriously wrong with them. It will be so nice when they've actually moved out.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
3rd rock, Buffy01, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Buffy01
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Veteran Member
Samicat
loves writing
Member Since: Jan 2023
Location: Canada
Posts: 553
1,590 hugs
given |
#802
It's the last day of the month and my disability payment hasn't gone into my account. I'm on leave since June for depression and anxiety and stress.
I just sent an email to the adjuster. I had spoken to him earlier this month and told him what I was doing to get better (meditating and writing a bit, seeing a counsellor), and he said I sound "functional" and like I'm ready to return to work and he would have a rehab consultant contact me. This is completely wrong. I sent him an email advising him that I am not functional, tend to mask and downplay my symptoms, and just because I am pleasant on the phone (I have worked on the phones for 20+ years) doesn't mean I'm okay. I asked that I be evaluated by a professional (since I recently lost my psychiatrist of 12 years to retirement) if any further proof of my condition is needed. Later my GP told me she sent him a report from my psychiatrist advising that I should stay off work. He never responded. Nobody ever told me I will not get my payment, but now I am worried. Must this be such a ****ing struggle? It's bad enough dealing with my illness without worrying about how I'm going to eat. p.s. the payment usually goes in on around the 26th. It could be late but... |
3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, Rose76, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat, TheGal
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Veteran Member
3rd rock
would rather be camping
Member Since: May 2019
Location: Canada
Posts: 519
5,805 hugs
given |
#803
Quote:
I have finished a first draft of a second chapter. It's terrible and the entire thing will have to be thrown out on rewrites, but I'm pressing ahead anyways. It's important to keep moving, so I can get to the later chapters which are much more interesting and exciting. Right now I'm just sounding out the plot and characters. I don't really outline, I prefer to 'pants' it, which takes longer. I do have an extensive notes file, but that's not a proper outline. |
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Breaking Dawn, Rose76, Samicat, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat, TheGal
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Breaking Dawn, Samicat
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Wise Elder
Buffy01
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,460
(SuperPoster!)
9,664 hugs
given |
#804
I been feeling really awful because of how my sister in a rude way when I mentioned sometimes I get really lonely at home that led her to start arguing which really hurt my feelings
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, Rose76, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat, TheGal
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Veteran Member
Samicat
loves writing
Member Since: Jan 2023
Location: Canada
Posts: 553
1,590 hugs
given |
#805
Well good luck with it. Writing is hard but also rewarding.
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3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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3rd rock
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Legendary
Rose76
Treading water.
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 12,404
(SuperPoster!)
5,302 hugs
given |
#806
Yesterday I was in good shape mentally. Ran errands, cleaned the kitchen, payed bills, showered. It felt so good to not be depressed.
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3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Legendary Wise Elder
SlumberKitty
is staying stable.
Member Since: Jul 2018
Location: CA
Posts: 27,329
(SuperPoster!)
117.7k hugs
given |
#807
My anxiety is better but my depression is worse. It's always one or the other.
__________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, Rose76, T4bbyCat
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Wise Elder
Buffy01
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,460
(SuperPoster!)
9,664 hugs
given |
#808
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, T4bbyCat
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Grand Magnate
will19
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2012
Posts: 3,612
1,097 hugs
given |
#809
Did my usual cleaning this morning. This time I was able to clean the floors because I got my mop handle delivered earlier this week. I didn't clean the floors with a mop last week because the handle had not arrived before last Saturday.
It's funny how I always seem to feel pretty good in the mornings. In the mornings, after breakfast, I tend to feel refreshed, invigorated, and alive. After lunch I feel more let down - tired and depressed. I usually have things to do in the mornings and then it seems like I run out of work before lunch. I don't know how to change that. |
3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, Rose76, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat, TheGal
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Veteran Member
Samicat
loves writing
Member Since: Jan 2023
Location: Canada
Posts: 553
1,590 hugs
given |
#810
Quote:
That sucks. I hope you get it soon. It can be so hard waiting for money to come in. |
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3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Veteran Member
Samicat
loves writing
Member Since: Jan 2023
Location: Canada
Posts: 553
1,590 hugs
given |
#811
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3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Legendary
Breaking Dawn
Thankful for my blessings.
Member Since: Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 16,689
(SuperPoster!)
42.2k hugs
given |
#812
Been depressed. I might be getting better.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
3rd rock, Rose76, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Wise Elder
Buffy01
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,460
(SuperPoster!)
9,664 hugs
given |
#813
I went for a walk thinking that it would improve my mood. I felt awful again again.
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, Rose76, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Legendary
Rose76
Treading water.
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 12,404
(SuperPoster!)
5,302 hugs
given |
#814
I fekt good today. Got out of bed at a reasonable hour. Got dressed. Did some cooking and cleaning. Refilled a bird feeder. I like that daylight lasts longer.
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Breaking Dawn, D-a-n, Samicat, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Member
D-a-n
has no updates.
Member Since: Apr 2017
Location: inside, trying to see out
Posts: 305
90 hugs
given |
#815
I've hit a bad patch in life. My last therapist defined what I'm feeling as agitated depression. I hate this.
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3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Veteran Member
3rd rock
would rather be camping
Member Since: May 2019
Location: Canada
Posts: 519
5,805 hugs
given |
#816
I managed to write about 10,000 words towards the first draft of my new novel this weekend. That's very good progress. I'm not trying to write the chapters in order but jumping back and forth to different spots based on my outline and writing different scenes. It's not ideal, because it means I'll have a lot more material I'll have to throw out and write anew in later drafts. But it's important to get this thing rolling and stop wallowing in hopelessness. For the final draft I've set a personal due date of March 1, 2024. This will give me about one year from when I started writing the first draft. I think that's a reasonable, practical goal.
I called in sick to work on Thursday night. I work nights, and I work a four-day week of ten-hour shifts. I called in sick because I was having trouble sleeping. I call in sick a lot less than I used to, this was just the first time I've called in sick this year. The last time I called in sick to work was in August of last year. That's not counting a couple of days I missed in December because I couldn't drive to work due to snow. Because of my substantially improved attendance, my income last year was significantly higher than the year before. I'm hoping that trend will continue. |
Breaking Dawn, D-a-n, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Legendary Wise Elder
SlumberKitty
is staying stable.
Member Since: Jul 2018
Location: CA
Posts: 27,329
(SuperPoster!)
117.7k hugs
given |
#817
Depression seems to be sucking me into a black hole. I hope I can hang onto some roots or something on my way down the hole so I don't fall all the way to the bottom.
__________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
Breaking Dawn, D-a-n, T4bbyCat, TheGal
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Grand Member
TheGal
has no updates.
Member Since: Aug 2022
Location: The House
Posts: 894
546 hugs
given |
#818
Quote:
I'd get that confirmed or investigated by a good pdoc. In my case, I was agitated, but it turned out to be major depression with psychotic features. What meds do you take? And are you seeing a therapist and pdoc now? |
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Breaking Dawn, D-a-n, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Grand Member
TheGal
has no updates.
Member Since: Aug 2022
Location: The House
Posts: 894
546 hugs
given |
#819
Quote:
Just checking in with you, @D-a-n |
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Breaking Dawn, D-a-n, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat
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Wise Elder
Buffy01
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,460
(SuperPoster!)
9,664 hugs
given |
#820
I have feeling really awful about myself.
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
Breaking Dawn, D-a-n, Samicat, SlumberKitty, T4bbyCat, TheGal
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