For Those With Mental/Emotional Struggles, do You Go Incommunicado Sometimes?

Hi, everyone. I wasn't sure if this was the correct place to post this. I understand if if it needs to be moved. I'm a lifelong depressive (due to abuse), sometimes have anxiety & occasional PTSD. I will withdraw sometimes. Which was easier to do when I was living on my own & only did my volunteering, errands & shopping. Now I live with a friend, so there is some socializing every day. But, I still do isolate to a certain extent. Mainly online.

I have a close friend who retreats sometimes. She lives with her fiance, his sons, her friend & the friend's son is there PT. She also works, so can't get away to the same extent as I do. I think those of us who are introverts or ambiverts that lean introvert, who have mental/emotional struggles, pull away as often as needed.

I'm posting about this because I have a newer friend. We've known each other about five months. We're both cancer patients that were in need of housing. I was blessed that I was able to move in with one of my friends. He & I both have the same caseworker. We have some trauma experiences in common. We have some similarities with views, beliefs, interests. We can talk about anything. We laugh together. We have affection. We have this great energy between us. I haven't heard from him in a couple of weeks. I've sent him a handful of texts. He's not responding to our caseworker either. I was concerned I said/did something that triggered him. Unintentionally, of course. Other friends have said it may have nothing to do with me. All I know is, he isn't in contact & I'm concerned.

I'm sure that all of you are different about how you are when you resurface. For the most part, after you've kept away, do you start communicating again with those you've shut out? Once you have a stronger connection & are more trusting with them, do you not disappear, let them know before you do or don't, but reply to them sooner than others? I'm just hopeful I'll be one he does that with. Based on how well our friendship has been developing. I've really been hurting not knowing what's going on.

Sometimes life and depression just become so overwhelming there's little room for much else.

I noticed that I'm slipping when I have a hard time responding to emails.

When I'm like this, I like quick checkins from friends especially when they acknowledge I may not be in a position to write back, but that the door is open and they are there for me if I need any help.

With close friends I do get back with them within a day or so. I thought he & I had gotten to the point we were closer. Maybe he's the type, it doesn't matter how strong the connection usually is, when he needs to retreat, everyone gets shut out.

It's a concern that neither you nor his caseworker have heard from him. It's a worry when someone self-isolates like that.

I wouldn't take it personally (though that can be easier said than done).

Maybe write every so often and let him know that you're there for him??

Someone, like the caseworker, may need to actually go physically check on him as it's quite worrisome.

Yes, i fold up into myself sometimes.