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#301
I felt depressed a weird this morning. I just had that depressed feeling but not really knowing why.
When I woke up in the middle of night, I was reaching for a handkerchief when I needed to blow my nose. I had the handkerchief further away and when I reached for it I threw out my right shoulder. It's still sore now and it was sore when I worked out this morning. Also it's been noisy with construction of the apartments across the street and a big project just began down the street from me. I feel heartbroken that the nice and quiet corner of the neighborhood where I am has now gone to Hell. |
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#302
Quote:
Around here they are almost done with the buildings a block from me, now they want to build more on this very busy and $hitty intersection. They will probably move the bus stop there. Driving will be impossible soon; I might have to take the bus sometimes just to avoid the gridlock that will occur. Even though they demolished the old buildings and gas station, construction may not even start for months. I kind of want them to get started so they will be done sooner. But I don't want to go out of my way yet to get home/leave home. I'm not ready for that change. __________________ Call me "owl" for short! Hmmm....looks like some good tips in here. "Okay, enough photos. I'm a very BUSY Business Kitty, so make an appointment next time." |
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3rd rock, Anonymous41141, T4bbyCat, unaluna
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#303
I've been doing well. But I started slipping today. The weather is getting fall-like. Last year, in Nov, I got real depressed, and it took months to get over that. I don't want that to happen again. I need to get out of the house more.
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#304
I was busy this morning with laundry and shopping afterwards. I feel like my depression is lifting a little bit.
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#305
Now I really am worried. Today I did nothing, but read online. I don't want to fall into a downward spiral, but it's starting.
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#306
Quote:
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
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#307
Pretty busy this morning with light cleaning and making a batch of spaghetti sauce. After it's over, I feel let down.
Tomorrow I'm having a blood test. I always worry about receiving bad news. Thankfully, every time I feel that way, I get my results and it ends up pretty good. Still it puts a damper in my spirits to have it coming up. I took out the trash this morning and took brief seconds to see the apartments of people who lived in them and now they are gone and the units are empty. These people I knew had lived here for a number of years and now they're gone. That depressed me, even though I never developed a relationship with them. |
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#308
Quote:
We seem to have a vacancy every couple of months. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Call me "owl" for short! Hmmm....looks like some good tips in here. "Okay, enough photos. I'm a very BUSY Business Kitty, so make an appointment next time." |
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3rd rock, Anonymous41141, T4bbyCat
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#309
Been real unmotivated. I have to pull up out of this.
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#310
I recently was banned from a favorite forum of mine on which I had a lot of (internet) friends. I believe this was in error, and I've contacted the administrators to ask them to reconsider, but they haven't replied. This really bothers me because there were people on that site I really liked and I could go there to speak to people who were friendly and casual with me. Now it feels like I don't have anywhere to go and I've lost contact with a lot of 'friends.'
I'm working my way back to returning to work, however I still have no timeline for this. I've stopped taking a number of my lesser meds due to cost concerns; I've run out of drug coverage and I cannot afford $110-140 a week in prescriptions. The only ones I've stopped taking are ones I think I can live without; I'm still taking the important psychiatric meds. Otherwise I have nothing to do and no one to turn to. The isolation is crippling and painful. I have no answers. At least I'm still successfully avoiding alcohol. I suppose that's some small victory. |
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#311
I'm doing pretty good. I just have to keep pushing. My place is clean and neat, which gives me a boost.
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#312
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I don't have anyone in real life except for one person. And during Covid lockdowns in 2020, I was cut off because I couldn't get online. I relied on the library for over 30 years and suddenly they were closed just like everything else. So I can kind of get it! This is the only forum I go to, and at that time I still had a lot of people to talk to here. Since then many have not come back or deleted their accounts altogether. So I know that feeling of isolation; I still recall it even 4 years later. __________________ Call me "owl" for short! Hmmm....looks like some good tips in here. "Okay, enough photos. I'm a very BUSY Business Kitty, so make an appointment next time." |
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#313
I had a meeting with my employer this past week regarding my ongoing medical leave due to psychiatric condition. I hope to return to work soon. The HR representative is making life unnecessarily difficult, and the union has taken up the cause to fight for me. It's complicated and I don't feel like going into all the details here, but I believe the company is engaged in unlawful discrimination on the basis of ability (e.g. medical condition). My actual return to work is unknown, even if I will imminently be medically cleared to return. It's not right, but with the union fighting for me I believe it will work out in my favor. In the meantime, it will continue to be the source of major stress, which is something I don't need.
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#314
I have been feeling really bad about my life especially lately
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
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#315
Quote:
Oh, Rock we can still listen. __________________ Call me "owl" for short! Hmmm....looks like some good tips in here. "Okay, enough photos. I'm a very BUSY Business Kitty, so make an appointment next time." |
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#316
I don't feel depressed, but I'm acting depressed at times, by just not doing anything. That will eventually make me feel depressed, if I don't get up and get going.
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#317
Quote:
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
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3rd rock
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#318
I've been sitting at the kitchen table for over 2 hours. I just got up to go make my bed. Soon as I entered the bedroom, all I wanted was to go back to bed. I've had plenty of sleep. I just feel very uneasy. I feel like the uneasy feeling would simmer down, if I got into my nice, warm, comfortable bed.
So I came back to sitting in the kitchen. Lying down would be a very bad idea. I have a few important things to do today. This is kind of a low level of depression. It seems so difficult to just stay vertical. Every morning is like this, only it is getting worse. |
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#319
I'm ok but feel frozen. I need to get up and get groceries but it's been dark and raining. Looks like it's clearing up so I must go get groceries. And more. My sons second bike I got is rusty too so he wants some wd40 for it. A bit down but I need to stay on top of any messes around here, and I need my younger son to get motivated to get counselling for his addictions and depression so he can get a job, soon I hope.
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#320
Quote:
: I’m very sorry: __________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
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