[3rd rock]

I have been in treatment for about 3 weeks so far, and I have about a week left. I could apply for an extension if I want, but I don't think I want to. Because my medications are all out of whack, I'm finding it difficult to focus on treatment. Also, much of what I'm being taught I already knew anyways. Furthermore, I'm finding it difficult to relate to my peers here in treatment, although that may just be an expression of my general difficulties in socializing.

I'm deeply depressed, and I find myself experiencing random crying spells. The medication they put me on I've had to discontinue due to severe side effects which leave me all but completely disabled. Once I get out of treatment I will need to see a psychiatrist to get on a new medication, and who knows how long that will take.

The novel is not going well. I'm going to start a new draft the day after I get home from treatment. I hope to have it done by the end of September, and then a subsequent draft by the end of the year. I will pull out all the stops to get it done. My lack of progress has left me deeply depressed and very sad.

[Rose76]

I'm still doing pretty well. Pruned some shrubs in our courtyard and a rose bush. It left me sore. Wish I could fall asleep.

[nonightowl]

The older I get the more any change or disruption sends me into a tailspin. One of my next door neighbors has moved out. He's been a good neighbor and I never got one second of noise or trouble. He was kind enough to let me know by leaving me a note Monday that he will be leaving the end of the month, which is now much to my dismay. For some reason I thought it was the 23rd and I still had a week to process this.

He also said I have been a great neighbor, about time someone noticed that.

Now I'll get remodeling noise, noise from when the manager shows the place and move in noise. When there’s a effing vacancy they work 7 days a week making all that noise. They start at 8am and keep remodeling these apartments over and over. There’s only so much they can do.

Anyway he was my neighbor 4 years so I’m spoiled. Will, I know you can relate to uncertainty of new neighbors. This election is already killing me and now this.

August is usually my favorite month because of no holidays but now I'll probably get a new neighbor in the middle of the month. I feel like summer is when bad things happen to me.

It seems like everything is going wrong at once. My neighbor is gone and yesterday in the mail I got a jury summons for a seedy part of town. It's for the week of September 2nd which is Labor Day. Even though I may not have to report, I already worry. Nobody wants to go there.

I even had a nightmare last night that when I called that number, a woman answered (it's automated in real life) to tell me something different from what the form says. And she said to look also for an email but it wasn't on there.

It's the routine of calling in every night after 7pm for 5 days, though I don't know how they handle a holiday, like does it count. I know I can't drive in that hellish traffic and deal with the parking. 7 is awfully late to know if I have to get up earlier. And the usual threatening language is all over the form like I better not miss checking in.

Now all I’m doing is agonizing over jury duty and neighbors. It takes me 2 months to adjust to a new neighbor at least.

And regarding people not following through or up, that happens to me a lot too. Or lip service, I guess that means the same thing. It’s a matter of time before I find out if someone telling me something they will do is just lip service. Both people and companies aren’t what they used to be. Or maybe because I’m older I’m more aware of bs.



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Sent from my iPhone

[will19]

To Nonightowl: I'm sorry to hear about your nice neighbor moving out and the summons to jury duty. I've had nice neighbors next to me move out, but I've been fortunate that the new neighbors turned out alright. I could happen to you, and I know how anxiety inducing this is.

About me: I've been having depression a lot lately, especially when I get out of bed. I had a pain in upper arm about a month ago. That pain is gone but now the pain found it's way to my lower back. I prefer the pain in the arm than in the lower back.

I have a doctor's appointment next week and I'm not looking forward to it. It has me down also.

[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by will19

To Nonightowl: I'm sorry to hear about your nice neighbor moving out and the summons to jury duty. I've had nice neighbors next to me move out, but I've been fortunate that the new neighbors turned out alright. I could happen to you, and I know how anxiety inducing this is.

About me: I've been having depression a lot lately, especially when I get out of bed. I had a pain in upper arm about a month ago. That pain is gone but now the pain found it's way to my lower back. I prefer the pain in the arm than in the lower back.

I have a doctor's appointment next week and I'm not looking forward to it. It has me down also.

Thanks Will. I just feel I’ve been on a winning streak that won’t last, regarding neighbors, and that it won’t last cause that’s how my life goes. The woman before him was a good neighbor too so I’ve had a good run….Now crap will move in. Why couldn’t he have waited until my jury service was done lol? Thanks for your reply, that’s why I post in YOUR check in thread.

I’m relieved it’s not after the time change because it will be dark around 5 and I can’t be out driving or riding buses alone in the dark. Jury people don’t care about my safety; it’s impossible to get out of now, even not getting paid from your employer will not fly. They say I better not be late, better call daily, etc.

I’m stiff when I get up and it takes time to get moving. I do exercises on my hips and neck daily or I don’t feel right. I hope your appointment goes okay. I hate going to doctors because they just say what’s wrong with you, not what’s right. My blood sugar improved but she didn’t mention it. Instead she tells me my cholesterol is too high. I’m doing the right things and there’s only so much I can do.

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Sent from my iPhone

[3rd rock]

Originally Posted by nonightowl

The older I get the more any change or disruption sends me into a tailspin. One of my next door neighbors has moved out. He's been a good neighbor and I never got one second of noise or trouble. He was kind enough to let me know by leaving me a note Monday that he will be leaving the end of the month, which is now much to my dismay. For some reason I thought it was the 23rd and I still had a week to process this.

He also said I have been a great neighbor, about time someone noticed that.

Now I'll get remodeling noise, noise from when the manager shows the place and move in noise. When there’s a effing vacancy they work 7 days a week making all that noise. They start at 8am and keep remodeling these apartments over and over. There’s only so much they can do.

Anyway he was my neighbor 4 years so I’m spoiled. Will, I know you can relate to uncertainty of new neighbors. This election is already killing me and now this.

August is usually my favorite month because of no holidays but now I'll probably get a new neighbor in the middle of the month. I feel like summer is when bad things happen to me.

It seems like everything is going wrong at once. My neighbor is gone and yesterday in the mail I got a jury summons for a seedy part of town. It's for the week of September 2nd which is Labor Day. Even though I may not have to report, I already worry. Nobody wants to go there.

I even had a nightmare last night that when I called that number, a woman answered (it's automated in real life) to tell me something different from what the form says. And she said to look also for an email but it wasn't on there.

It's the routine of calling in every night after 7pm for 5 days, though I don't know how they handle a holiday, like does it count. I know I can't drive in that hellish traffic and deal with the parking. 7 is awfully late to know if I have to get up earlier. And the usual threatening language is all over the form like I better not miss checking in.

Now all I’m doing is agonizing over jury duty and neighbors. It takes me 2 months to adjust to a new neighbor at least.

And regarding people not following through or up, that happens to me a lot too. Or lip service, I guess that means the same thing. It’s a matter of time before I find out if someone telling me something they will do is just lip service. Both people and companies aren’t what they used to be. Or maybe because I’m older I’m more aware of bs.



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Sent from my iPhone

Is there any way to get out of jury duty? I've been summoned twice in my life, but both times I got out of it by telling them I was medically incapable of serving and listing my mental health history. Both times my requests to be disqualified were approved without any request for documentary evidence.

[Buffy01]

this month is always because of the birthday and anniversary

[Rose76]

I'm not doing too well. Emotionally, the depression has stayed away . . . but I'm real low on motivation. Not getting much done.

[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by Buffy01

this month is always because of the birthday and anniversary

Dear Buffy, what anniversaries and birthdays are they? I can relate, as the holiday season has several unhappy ones for me, and that’s already 2 months of h e l l for that reason alone.

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Sent from my iPhone

[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by 3rd rock

Is there any way to get out of jury duty? I've been summoned twice in my life, but both times I got out of it by telling them I was medically incapable of serving and listing my mental health history. Both times my requests to be disqualified were approved without any request for documentary evidence.

Rock, sadly no. Only living outside the county or being deceased will you get out. I MAY not have to go, as I have to call this automated system after 7pm for 5 days to see if I have to report the next day. I got called for service 2 years ago but didn’t have to report. It was a better location. I have no medical condition for exemption. If under 70 you need a doctor’s statement on the form and even then they want details on when you’d be fit. If over 70 you write down the reason.

I see why people try to get out of it. They treat you like cattle when you arrive, pay a measly $15 a DAY and 15 cents a mile, one way only as if you don’t go home. And the notice is filled with threats about fines and jail if you don’t cooperate. Of course they could be idle threats but who knows? It depends on whether it’s federal or county and what area you’re in, where it might be a tad better on pay and mileage.

The system needs an overhaul like everything else. It’s less than a month away and I’m already agonizing over it. Thanks for your reply.

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[unaluna]

Rock, if you are mentally compromised, write that down. Are you on disability? I once answered that i was on meds that required me to use the bathroom frequently. Personally i dont think i could sit still that long around other peopke without acting out.

[Rose76]

Not doing good today. Got nothing accomplished. I would feel much better now, if I had gotten showered, dressed and out of the house. I didn't. It's like I'm ruled by a compulsion to let my life fall apart. I feel pretty relaxed though. Like I just don't care.

[will19]

I'm depressed. I have an appointment tomorrow morning and it will be a minor procedure. It's not a big deal but it's something I'm not looking forward to. I wish I didn't have to go.

Along with feeling depressed and anxious about tomorrow, it doesn't help that it's hot outside and having to put up with unwanted noises that's like torture to me.

[Rose76]

I feel pretty good today. Need to be less lazy. My place is chaotic looking.

[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by will19

snip:

Along with feeling depressed and anxious about tomorrow, it doesn't help that it's hot outside and having to put up with unwanted noises that's like torture to me.

It’s hot here too and I too get the noise that accompanies hot weather. I actually thought Will gets it. Even though I hate the dark days of winter, the neighbors are much more subdued and don’t have their windows and doors open. When that happens I can really hear the crap. People 2 doors down have 2 screaming kids, barking dog, and guests a lot…with the door open. When winter finally gets here I’ll tell myself people settle down more.

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[will19]

I had my minor procedure this morning. The procedure went well, but now I have to do self-care for a little while and there's some restrictions. The first two days following a procedure like that is the worst, I think. It's worse than the procedure itself.

I couldn't sleep last night because of thinking about my appointment today. Plus it was pretty hot in my room. I feel tired today because of the lack of sleep and the appointment. Now I'm glad it's over with but I'll be much happier when the self-care and restrictions are over.

[will19]

Originally Posted by nonightowl

It’s hot here too and I too get the noise that accompanies hot weather. I actually thought Will gets it. Even though I hate the dark days of winter, the neighbors are much more subdued and don’t have their windows and doors open. When that happens I can really hear the crap. People 2 doors down have 2 screaming kids, barking dog, and guests a lot…with the door open. When winter finally gets here I’ll tell myself people settle down more.

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Sent from my iPhone

The noise is really something during hot days. There are hardly any kids around where I live but once in a while there are neighbors who would have get-togethers; and they really make a lot of noise. Loud talking, loud laughing, and screaming. I don't get it with the screaming; which gets on my nerves the most. Oh, they are adults by the way!

This morning I had some time at home before my appointment. About an hour before I left for it, there was a lot of noise coming from across the street with the construction of the new apartments going up. That didn't help my anxiety before having to go to my appointment.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by nonightowl

Dear Buffy, what anniversaries and birthdays are they? I can relate, as the holiday season has several unhappy ones for me, and that’s already 2 months of h e l l for that reason alone.

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Sent from my iPhone

it’s my dad birthday and the anniversary of him passing away

[will19]

The procedure I had last Wednesday is over and I'm happy about it; but the recovering, self-care from the procedure, and restrictions seem harder for me than the procedure itself.

Even though I'm retired and feeling like my life is not exciting, there are two things that help me through; and I can't do them now. It's the band-resistance workout and bike riding. Also I have to be cautious with heavy lifting and straining. I'm able to function alright, but I have to be careful or I could have a set-back.

The stitches will be removed a week from Monday (the 19th) and I could get back to normal. Next week will drag. I feel depressed that I'm having a disruption now. I was able to take a shower this morning after not being allowed to in the last couple of days.

[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by will19

The noise is really something during hot days. There are hardly any kids around where I live but once in a while there are neighbors who would have get-togethers; and they really make a lot of noise. Loud talking, loud laughing, and screaming. I don't get it with the screaming; which gets on my nerves the most. Oh, they are adults by the way!

This morning I had some time at home before my appointment. About an hour before I left for it, there was a lot of noise coming from across the street with the construction of the new apartments going up. That didn't help my anxiety before having to go to my appointment.

Same here, as the adults can be noisier than the kids and kids learn by example. If the effing parents don’t teach them to be considerate of others around them they will be self centered. That’s the only thing my parents did right: Teach me the world doesn’t revolve around me.

My bedroom is hot too because there’s no wall a/c or anything there, plus the sun beams relentlessly on that wall in the afternoon. If I open the window and use the window fan, which is something, I get the noise from the garage. So I have to wait until it’s really late to open it when most people should be asleep.

I still haven’t gotten a new neighbor but it will be soon because they fill vacancies FAST here. Waiting for it is worse than the noise I’ll get when they move in. I hope they do it all at once and not at night. If so they will walk back and forth past my bedroom towards the elevator, pushing a dolly and making all that noise.

I know what it’s like to temporarily stop what sustains me too, such as not exercising after a procedure. I hate disruptions more than ever now. I wasn’t this bad when I was much younger. Maybe it’s the chaotic times we are in. I recently heard the aftermath of a traffic accident and the sound was worse than the sight.

It was at my hair salon but I had my back to the window. But my stylist saw it and gasped. She instantly sprang into action as well as her assistant, calling 911. And they went to help in any way they could even though the police and ambulance arrived quickly, the assistant offered the driver some water as it was hot. I got to thinking what if that was me, I’d depend on Good Samaritans because I’d have nobody to call. And I’d have to admit that. I know you can relate as a neighbor once had an emergency you posted about. It really rattled me. The driver started to cry and I almost did, I felt empathy. The car was really damaged too.

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