[silver_moon]

deleted...

[cantstopcrying]

((((((((((((((((((((((((((molly)))))))))))))))))))))))) you're not ok when you are ready, those trees are still there, so is muffy's curb, and my shoulder.

[purplebutterfly]

((((((((Supermansgirlfriend)))))))))))))
i am here if you need to talk

[pegasus]

You get help and you get away from it as soon as possible!

(((((((( Molly ))))))))

[silver_moon]

[silver_moon]

I didn't know where to put this thread when I wrote it... I didn't think I could even write as much as I have done and I haven't really said anything, so it shouldn't have scared me about writing what I have done, right? But it did and I had second thoughts... but maybe I need answers. ?
I didn't know wether to put it in here or in the survivors of abuse forum or elsewhere. I didn't want to put it in the survivors of abuse forum because 1. I'm not a survivor 2. It's still happening 3. I don't even know if it's classed as abuse, yet posts I have read and articles I have read say it is. But, I don't want that to be true. I don't want it to be abuse because that makes it harder? I'm so confused. I don't think I'm strong enough to talk about it (well, I could talk about it) I just don't want to here the consequences. If I talked to my social worker or T (which I am on a waiting list for... so haven't seen a T yet) and they believe it's abuse... they have the right to tell someone don't they? But, what happens then? What happens to me family, what happens to me I can't hurt other people in the process.
I'm lost. I don't know what to do. I wish I could afford to move away... far away, move country... I can't even afford to live in a council flat! I have £5 to my name and my doctor says I can't work because I'm not mentally stable enough, so she's written me a sick note so I can claim benefits (I even feel bad about that, it's not right to take money without earning it... it's scrounging)

.....

.....

[Fuzzybear]

[cantstopcrying]

Bless your heart, sweety....worrying about hurting other people by telling. It's time for you to worry about how you are hurting. Abuse is anything--anything at all--that hurts you. No one--not a family member, not a friend, not a stranger off the street--has the right to do anything to you that you do not want them to. Telling is very scary, because you don't know what will happen--the fear of the unknown is what causes inaction. It's a case of "the devil you know or the devil you don't know." Pegasus was right--you tell and get away, as far away as you can. You can't afford to move out but if you are being abused, IN ANY WAY, there are places you can go for help. Just because your abuse may not seem "as bad" as someone elses doesn't make it any less real. If it is still happening you have to--have to-- notify someone. YOU HAVE TO BE SAFE. Please. It's not your responsibility to worry about hurting others by telling. It's not your fault, you are a victim! Take the help that is being offered by you being out of work. I know what you're saying about not earning it, but it is meant for people like you.

[purplebutterfly]

Hon, you need to not worry about hurting those that hurt you, i know that right now you feel that you can not tell on those that hurt you, but you really need to YOU NEED TO STAY SAFE, i am always here if you ever need to vent or talk about it- abuse no matter what kind is ABUSE and you do NOT deserve it

(((((((((supermansgirlfriend)))))))))))))))))))))))))))
If it is still going on. If you can tell someone
You are worth way more than that
No one deserves to be abused...........
You are not hurting others by telling...
you are getting you help and them.........
Your health very much matters
You matter
Years ago when i was abused I never told...
I hide it....
I never deserve it nor do you.....or anyone................
Its not something I talk about alot...
But you need to know ...........that you need to be safe....
You are very brave... Please keep yourself safe and tell....
all the peace and kindness i can send you
my curb canstopcrying is always there for you
muffy

[silver_moon]

what if its someone close (the 'abuser'), what if others are in the same situation as me (but they dont want anything to happen to the 'abuser')
im not in this alone... but i cant talk to the other people about it, I've tried before

((((supermansgirlfriend)))))))))))))))))))))
you can report it..............
to help you and the others
you by no means deserve this.......
The first step is to protect you ..
keeping others safe is very important too
Lots of times the abuser is sadly is someone close
imo getting away from that stuation would help you
look for hot line #s in your area...
please stay safe
muffy

[nowheretorun]

think about all your options if you can girlfriend.. no wants to experience discomfort on either side, not on the abusers and definately not on your own side... they never like getting caught and your own reasons for not liking the abuse are self evident... protect yourself and those you love... exercise your healthiest options for yourself and do what you are able to help others...

[(JD)]

LEAVE! That's what to do.

Here's a link to how to know if it's abuse: http://www.startingpointnh.org/know.html

This has one UK resource http://www.playingtheangel.org/

Here is a UK resource site: http://www.hiddenhurt.co.uk/

Quit questioning. Go to some place safe (generally that means don't tell anyone right now!) If it turns out it really isn't abuse, you can always go back and work things out.

YOU are the most important person in this right now. Be safe.

[silver_moon]

thanks muffy, thanks nowheretorun
n thanks sky for those links

thank you all

[multipixie9]

((((superman's girlfriend))))

Bad people count on pain and shame to keep you hiding what they did. They want you hiding in the dark, crying alone. They create fear to keep you quiet. They are sick, vile, evil, rotten, creepy jerks.

When you turn on a light the creepy roaches run and hide. Your abuser is like a creepy little bug that someone needs to flip the light on and point it out so someone can call the pest control and let them deal with the creepy roach guy.

You are not to blame, you did not do wrong, the abuser is the bad one. Telling is how to take the steps away from it. Be safe, protect yourself. Any other person being abused may be hoping someone will tell on this person because they are too scared to tell.

Someday when you are strong again you can earn your wages and maybe volunteer somewhere and help society back for the temporary help you get now. Needing help is not the same as scrounging. Needing help is being human and knowing it won't always be like this.

Take Help Now, Give Help Later!!!

I'm glad you came here and told. That is a good thing to do.

Hugs from one who forgot to keep from telling

leslie and the pixies