[cantstopcrying]

Tomorrow is the last karate tournament of the year for my Kaity. She is currently number one on the Michigan Sport Karate Circuit for sparring in her age/division. She's 14, been doing karate for almost 5 years. There are times when it's hard financially for me to do it, but it's what makes her come alive. She is such a different person doing karate. Anyway, as you may know, I'm here in Boston. I won't be home until after the competition tomorrow. I have never missed a competition and I'm feeling terrible. I feel like a horrible mother. And because being here isn't hard enough with all the memories, I get to feel terrible about missing this. Not only will I not be there, but they've had to stay with my folks since Thursday and she doesn't like doing that. I try so hard to be good to them, but I don't feel like I'm doing good at that right now.

[TheDeliciousDish]

Originally Posted by cantstopcrying

Tomorrow is the last karate tournament of the year for my Kaity. She is currently number one on the Michigan Sport Karate Circuit for sparring in her age/division. She's 14, been doing karate for almost 5 years. There are times when it's hard financially for me to do it, but it's what makes her come alive. She is such a different person doing karate. Anyway, as you may know, I'm here in Boston. I won't be home until after the competition tomorrow. I have never missed a competition and I'm feeling terrible. I feel like a horrible mother. And because being here isn't hard enough with all the memories, I get to feel terrible about missing this. Not only will I not be there, but they've had to stay with my folks since Thursday and she doesn't like doing that. I try so hard to be good to them, but I don't feel like I'm doing good at that right now.

Your daughter has the opportunity to do something she really enjoys. She will keep that with her for the rest of her life. It's not something that may be apparent now (or for another 7-8 years, sad to say), but she'll really appreciate everything you have done for her. It's not easy being a parent financially. I'm only a parent of two kitties, and that's financially draining enough. It's not until we(I'm only 21, so I'll speak as a child here) are older that we truly appreciate what you have done for us as parents. The amount of time and money spent on us seems obscene looking back on it. Trust me, she'll appreciate it, and ultimately understand that you couldn't be there that one day, and that you still love her and care about her very much. Like I said, don't expect her to admit it any time soon (that's a rough age), but she loves you, and she'll understand.

*Hugs*, and hope this helped

~TheDeliciousDish

[digdug]

That is fantastic with your daughter...I hope my future theoretical kids get into martial arts, and wish I had when I was younger.

As for your situation, that sucks that you can't be there, but I'm sure your daughter understands the situation, and it sounds like you do everything except sell a kidney to keep her doing something she loves. You can feel upset at not being there, but don't let that translate into guilt. Sounds like you're doing everything just fine.

[silver_moon]

I think deliciousdish and digdug have said it all. You're a great mum and it's clearly obvious through your posts about them that you love them very much and are proud of them. She may feel upset that you can't be there for her, but this is a great oppurtunity for her and afterall, she wouldn't be able to do this without you. She'll be glad of this in time (in fact she's probably greatful for all you've done now, if she's showing it or not). Don't feel guilty, your kids love you..... and I thought you had a certain fairy that's helping you banish these kind of thoughts
Have a safe trip home.
Molly

[cantstopcrying]

You are so right! Silly fairy decided to take a nap while I posted. I poked her and told her to check her handbook, that napping on the job wasn't allowed. She apologized and said she'll work extra hard today!

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((((( cantstopcrying )))))))))))))))