[Miracle1986]

I have always heard voices to some extent, but today they are scarring me.
It's hard to explain, but everything they say... I hear it multiple times... it is like... echoing I guess.
I also hear them laughing at and mocking me
They telling (make that yelling at me) to do all kinds of scary stuff.
They want me to...
skin myself alive, stab myself, "bleed them out", take a lot of pills, etc...
they are saying that my husband would be better off without me.
They want me to hurt people (i.e. my husband's family)... emotionally and physically.
I don't know what made them start or how I can make them stop... without doing what they say.
I am scared out of my mind. For the first time in my life, I feel like out of control and like I need to be hospitalized,
but I have no insurance, my husband is currently out of work, and I don't work, so we have no way to pay for any such thing.
my heart is racing... I am so scared!!!!

[FerretGuy5]

Originally Posted by Manda86

I have always heard voices to some extent, but today they are scarring me.
It's hard to explain, but everything they say... I hear it multiple times... it is like... echoing I guess.
I also hear them laughing at and mocking me
They telling (make that yelling at me) to do all kinds of scary stuff.
They want me to...
skin myself alive, stab myself, "bleed them out", take a lot of pills, etc...
they are saying that my husband would be better off without me.
They want me to hurt people (i.e. my husband's family)... emotionally and physically.
I don't know what made them start or how I can make them stop... without doing what they say.
I am scared out of my mind. For the first time in my life, I feel like out of control and like I need to be hospitalized,
but I have no insurance, my husband is currently out of work, and I don't work, so we have no way to pay for any such thing.
my heart is racing... I am so scared!!!!

You definitely need to see someone about your problems. I know the money part seems insurmountable but really isn't. Your symptoms may appear as schizophrenia but likely are from depression. Stay ahead of hospitilization and get help before you get to a critical point. Your county health department should be the place to go for referral resources. Also you can call 1-800-273-TALK and they can often give a referral as to where to go for help.

[Miracle1986]

Originally Posted by FerretGuy5

Your county health department should be the place to go for referral resources.

I don't know if there is one near us. I have never heard of any.

[turquoisesea]

I dunno where you are, but I agree with ferret because at this point, I feel that you really need help - if you're feeling you need hospitalization...
Money is less important than your life.

I hope you can stay out of the hospital but I think to do that you will need to get some help, I dunno if you've tried meds, if you have any access...

ideas:
*do you have a primary care doctor? If so make an appointment and talk to that person about this. I know it might sounds strange, but at the very least they can give you advice, and you may walk out with a prescription (even though better to go to a Pdoc, if you REALLY can't afford one, primary care doc is good)

*One thing you might want to look for is a social worker. Sometimes they are cheaper and give rates for people with "low income" There ARE social workers that work with mental stuff.

Look up anything you can online.
Let us know if you still can't find anything, wishing you well

~turquoisesea

[Miracle1986]

I live in NorthEast Ga, Gwinnett county (Auburn to be exact)
I have already called my primary care doctor... she is booked solid for the next 3 weeks!!! But she is a whack anyway.
I am so scarred right now I am shaking... tried looking online but idk what to search for.

[brephi]

Manda, baby, your situation is "an emergency." Your primary care physician is supposed to see you immediately with the type of symptoms you are having. She is not supposed to place you on a 3-week waiting list. She has some nerve.

Manda, you need help right away. If you can't get into your PCP office, please call the 1-800 number that was referred to you earlier. They should be able to help you. If not, go to the emergency room. I care about you and want you to get help.

[FerretGuy5]

Go to your phone book and look up Georgia Department of Health Services, Mental Health. They should have a local crisis line there. This is something you need to do without delay, as thinking of self harm is a very serious thing. I will try to get you a local number.

ADDED: Try calling 770-868-4280 That is the Department of Family Services and they will connect you to a mental health referral. Georgia handles health issues at a state level, not county, as I had originally assumed.

Hope this helps in connecting with a professional as needed. If you feel you are in danger of acting on self harm, please do not hesitate going to a hospital emergency room or calling 911.

[bebop]

manda I live just north of you. if you would like pm me your number and I will be more than happy to give you a call. I will be up late so I am available.

[Miracle1986]

Originally Posted by bebop

if you would like pm me your number and I will be more than happy to give you a call. I will be up late so I am available.

i can't... they said if i do, i'll be sorry...

[bebop]

honey listen to me. they are only voices. you are the one in control. please let me see if I can help.

[Miracle1986]

I had what I guess would be classified as a breakdown around 6:30 this morning.
My husband had to take his sister to school, and when he got back, he found me
under the blankets, curled up in a fetal position, sobbing and shaking uncontrollably.
It took him like 10 minutes to get me to clam down enough to try and tell him what was the matter.
While almost hyperventilating I sobbed, "They want me dead!!!!!"

[turquoisesea]

*hugs*

I'm sorry the voices are doing that to you, it's very scary

sending you hugs, sorry that I don't have more to offer

[turquoisesea]

I'd like to agree, they ARE voices, if they were outside of your head would you obey? If someone across the room told you to do 100 jumping jacks, would you do it? Its the same. It FEELS soo different. But it's the same. These voices have no more RIGHT to tell you what to do than some random person across the room.

Please, do something like call your physician and insist on being seen, find the help you need, make the call to bebop maybe since bebop is right in your area, can give some advice. Or even pm, just, stay safe and sending hugs

[deliquesce]

you might not have to go to hospital, but you *do* need to act now.

call your GP and say this is an emergency. hell - just show up at her practice - she will have to see you then.

if you dont like your GP, just go to any other one in the area.

chances are you will be prescribed an antipsychotic. i've taken them before and they can be really helpful for situations like this.

[yutzman]

I'm also with the ferretguy5, you need help now! No waiting for your regular Psych Doc or in the ER....First of all, you need to calm down. By your post, it seems you can somewhat differentiate the voices from reality. So do that, make it a task.....and keep posting......always here to help....SY