[fadedspirit]

I really need to write, but I forgot where I put everything. I hope nobody minds that we decide to write here. I think something good may come of this. After the shocker, we all went silent. We've parted ways again but I've got little man hidden. I want to try to shield him from what's happening, because he really doesn't understand. I'm the most calm right now, but I have been quiet. It scares me so to know that rage has gone quiet. He needs desperately to talk to me, but he's disappeared somewhere. He's only surfaced a few times this week in short suddden bursts. He's upset dad and I've made promises that body host will not act out like that again. He becomming harder for me to control the more my parents hurt. I know that he wants to take their fears away, but he can't. He doesn't understand that he's limited to this body. I guess a little background would be helpful at this point. Mom was diagnosed a few weeks ago with kidney cancer and we were told that though it was serious, it could be taken care of and mom would lead a normal life after having surgery. Everything was fine till dad brought mom home from the doc 2 days ago. This is the first time rage showed in a very long time for us. I took control of the situation and got everyone calm, meaning parents and us. I held mom till she stopped crying and then consoled dad. Dad is usually not very emotional and has never needed consoled by our person.
We found out that mom has just about 3 months or less to live because her cancer is more progressed than what was originally conveyed. She's opted for surgery this thursday, which they only give her a 20 percent chance of making it through surgery. We cannot be at the hospital with her during this time, but dad will be there and that will be enough. So many things have been happening and we just don't have a break from it. All that matters right now to me is the well being of our family and trying to keep our body in check. I've also decided to take steps so that I may focus more on the situation at hand. I've written my lady friend's mother and told her that while I may not be around too much that she can feel free to call if she needs encouragement or just to talk, as she also has a minor form of cancer. I've also decided that the need for a job right now is of little concern because of our immediate situation. Our outside family needs care more than we do. I also have taken the initiative to care for the grandmother as much as possible. She has minor dementia, which causes her to act out of place at times, something that we understand very well. She even seems to know rage a bit and has talked to him on occasion. He seems to respect her deeply. I don't believe that she knows that she's talking to an alter within our body though, but that is ok. At this point, she doesn't need to know, because it may scare her. We feel a bit better now that we have written and need to go on about our daily tasks. Sorry to all for writing so much. If we've posted in the wrong place, we apologize. We're a little out of sorts at the moment. Thank you for allowing us a place to write though, we appreciate it. Spirit

[anderson]

(((((Spirit)))))
The lost of a trusted parent is hard. we hope that even though we are doing down time that you still feel our prays around you and those within.
Safe hugs from all of us to all of you.

[pegasus]

My thoughts are with you (((((((((( fadedspirit )))))))))) and safe hug for (((((((( rage ))))))))) too.

[Hunny]

Fadedspirit,

Keep close. These outside things happening can be draining and maybe coming here we can support you in the day to come.

What you are going through is added pressure and I know about that. I'm a little weak but getting stronger everyday so I hope I can be here to sit beside you.

Take some time for you each day okay?

safe

.