I told T a big big secret that others didn't want told. Now they are really upset at me--mad--spitting mad is more like it. won't even attempt to communicate.

Besides that, Pdoc is adjusting meds and I am more depressed than I've been in a long time. Just want to quit everything, cocoon and let whoever do whatever. I'm tired of it all. See Pdoc tomorrow and T on Monday--really don't want to wait that long to see T again. Just saw her yesterday.

WHY did I go and open yet another can of worms??? I have really blown it this time. Don't think this will be an easy one to rectify. It feels like a dark poison cloud around me and in my whole being. D**N!!! Why'd I do that???

[Gemstone]

{{{{{constellation}}}}}

I hope things get better for you soon.

thinking about you.

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((( constellation ))))))))

[hillbunnyb]

Maybe they'll get used to the idea you told and clam down after a little while. It's ok you told. It was time. You had to, for everybody's sake. It's ok to calm down now. No rush. Deep breaths. You did a scarey hard thing and I am proud of you for being so brave. PS now that you've got a fresh can of worms, you can go fishing whenever you want..... never know what you'll reel in out of your self, huh? You can do this healing thing. one bit at a time. nibble, nibble, nibble

WHY did I go and open yet another can of worms???

Because holding the poisonous secrets in will only spread the infection.

The wounds need to be lanced.

I know it doesn't seem it now, but you did the right thing for all.

[allthegirls6]

I know its hard but maybe it is time. i remember telling my T some horror stories, or rather the other girls telling my T and i was terrified and angry and hurt and all sorts of things. But in the end i managed to accept what they had said. The truth is I always really knew it, i just wasnt looking. It got better for me, trust me, it will get better for you.

atg

[Lexicon78]

(((((white iris)))))

People don't like the secrets to be told, especially if they're part of the cause.

Hang in there.

[Mahali]

I am hoping the road to peace is short and smooth. Here if you need us. Wish I could do more to help.

Wish I never said anything. T doesn't even know what to do with it. It affects things for sure, but it's just not in her realm of experience. So, now I kinda feel like I felt years ago when I told a Pdoc when he asked if I heard voices...Not really, but I have premenitions and hear and feel spirits and feel other people's pain like it's mine and that's why I don't have any emotions anymore. Well, he locked me up for 4 weeks and wanted me to tell him how to conduct a seance.

At least my T isn't like that. She's curious, interested but more trying to find out how it fits in--and it does. The ins and outs of the whole thing are what insiders are mad at me telling. Mostly because now they feel we will once again be looked at like some freaky circus side show so I stop here.

Sometimes it just isn't worth it...

[Mahali]

Maybe as others come to see that T will not treat you like a freak show they will come to accept and the anger will let up. I hope so.

[January]

(((((((((((( WI & Constellation ))))))))))))

I think Place made very good point. Maybe the others will be ok as soon as they realize your T will not treat you like a freak. Maybe this is the starting point to more healing.

If you need me, I'm here.

Hugs,

Jan

[Zorah]

{{{{{{{{{{the constellation}}}}}}}}}}

in the end, all the secrets have to come out so you can heal

We understand: they hurt

The Nest is here for you, we wish we could do more

[shadowdancer]

(((((((((the constellation)))))))))

new secrets revealed can be scary for everyone. i think your T is a good one and she won't look at you like any kind of side-show. she knows how secrets can throw things into upheaval. i am sure that she will handle it with care and consideration, just like you deserve.

please take care and keep us posted on how you guys are doing.


shadow