Awkward situation with friends?

I bet a lot of you guys get this when you have did/mpd, but I had a great group of friends and they were all really nice and accepting, but one day something happened and it triggered off Paul (my angry) who apparently got provoked and violent with them and not well that caused them to distance themselves from me, it sucks big time. So then recently I made a new buddy and that was awesome but, me being me I kind of forget to tell people I suffer from did sometimes and then if I switch in work/while i'm out it get really awkward, because they start asking why were you so quite today, or why didn't you come out ect. And i'm just thinking it wasn't me. Do any of you struggle with this? If so what do you do cause i hate pushing my friend(s) away but not all my others are going to be friends with them too, and not all my alters can go work/out so.... Yeah how do you deal with 'your' friends.

- Misha

nope this never happened to me. regardless of who I switched into everyone just thought I was me and it wasnt an issue because thats how I have always been..my first split into an alter was between the ages of 2-4 so how I was as an alter is how I have always been until I integrated. and even then people didnt notice much because everything the alters were, became me. so again I was just how I had always been to those around me.

but I do notice that asking a child or adult if they are ok, why are they so quiet, or rowdy moody what ever is just a normal thing for people to say to each other even normal people say it to other normal people...

I think its just human nature to notice when someone whether they are mentally ill, physically challenged or completely normal are participating in conversations/activities and check in with them...

many children learn this side of common manners/ respect for each other when they are in elementary school when teachers tell them to give everyone a chance to talk or play the games, answer questions read the story....

so to me it is no big deal if someone asks me if Im ok when Im quiet, or moody.

Unfortunatley not everyone can handle disability or chronic illness. A lot of it could be due to simple ignorance and misunderstanding. Maybe they believe your only DID if your like Sybil?

All you can do is try to teach them about it. If they truly can't handle it in tbe long run then i would want different friends anyway. But maybe for now they need time to get used to the idea.

Me well telling my BF has been both good and bad. Good because he accepts and loves all of us. Bad because he kind of sees me as an obscurity or game of "how many alters does monarch have" and sometimes has a nefative attitude about what some alters may do in public. He doesn't totally comprehend DID though so we are all working together. My mom is kinda freaked out. Most others can't know. Some found out that i didn't want too. Or an alter came out but things have been ok. So give your friends a little time and just keep repeating the truth

Thank for both you replys, i think my alters as obviously different so it makes it obvious to some people that i am off. Heh..

I make excuses and lie my way around the issue. Or confuse the issue. Or derail the subject.
Or I did. I'm at a point now where I can't do it an more. I mean I could, but I'm just tired of having to hide. If you understand what I mean. I can't stand any more secrets.

People who need to know in my life know. If things change in front of people who dont know then I will give them an explanation. I have switched a number of times in front of friends. One of my friends even goads the parts. She knows my triggers points. It is horrid.

Even though I feel like **** they are my friends. So its okay.

In support groups people do need an explanation so they don't get scared.

I told my very close friends, and I tend to always have at least one person who knows around all the time. I can usually tell if I'm going to switch, and thankfully it's not a daily thing most of the time. If I feel dissociative, I tell my friend, and tell them to get me out of that situation if I look like I've switched, because most of my alters can't hold in the fact that they're not me for more than 10 min. It's worked okay so far, though it can lead to some rough nights (my boyfriend had to lock himself and my not-so-nice alter in his bedroom at his moms house one night so the rest of our friends and his mother wouldn't think I was losing it), and it's usually a rough time on the person who's with me because they don't fully understand, but I haven't been publicly humiliated yet.

But yeah, my advice is take yourself out of the triggering situation, and into a new environment where the body's safe and your alter feels comfortable. Safety first than comfort though, as I learned the hard way a few times now.

i try to work through these problems internally whenever possible. you can tell someone that you're not always you, but from their perspective, when your physical body does something, you are responsible for it. even if you weren't you at the time. it can be very hard to understand from the outside looking in.
within my own system, if i have alters who are causing troubles at work, at home, with friend, etc., i try to work it out with them, rather than try to work it out with bosses, co-workers, wife, or friends. when done respectfully and open-mindedly, i find i get better results this way. it gives me a better platform to find out the root of the problem, and often paves the way to more insight from an alter.
i don't know how much co-consciousness you have, or how your internal communication works, so it may be different for you. just my suggestion.

People just think i'm different. They don't know why. I tell them I have a dissociative disorder and leave it at that ,except for my closest of friends ,my t , my sister and my bishop. I have found the more info yougive people about DID the less freaked out they are. It's not like those cheesy made for tv movies where the kiler as DID and he or she is like Dr Jekyl and Mr Hide. The tuth isn't as scary as what they imagine DID to be like.

I just don't have a lot of close friends anymore. It often hurts to be around other people and whether I'm switching or just having a difficult time with depression +/or anxiety, it makes it nearly impossible and extremely uncomfortable to try keeping up with friends who are socially active. Being sober makes it harder, too. I guess it's a good thing I'm never really alone, though it does get lonely sometimes. I hope you'll find some better way for yourself, Unhinged. We all have to do what works for us.

for clarity's sake, I should say that I am known among those who are friends and friends of friends as a unusual person. a "crazy guy". that is a rep that can be hard to outlive. even though I am mostly a quiet person, those time when a Wildman alter got away from me is what people remember.

one other thing- possum? I don't think any one whose taunting one or more of your alters is much of a friend. I don't know them, you, or the situation between you and them, but if they knew what they were putting you through they wouldn't be doing that. I really, really, dislike having personal issues, fears, and involuntary reactions (mine or anyone else's) use for someone else's entertainment.

jax01