[GunterWunter345]

As far as I know, I have one- maybe two or
more alters. The first alter,she's all out for revenge and stuff, having my earliest recollection of her being when I was two. - could be triggerin-I was beat up a lot by my dad and my so called friends at that age. There was a mentally ill girl who would beat me up for no reason. I think my alter got tired of hearing me cry all the time, so she started talking to me. Funny thing is, when I told my mom what I remembered from what happened years later, she accused me of making it up, but it happened. Here's what she said, along how I replied:

"Ugh. Not her again. She hurts you all the time! Why do you even go around her? I can't believe that your mom is enough of an idiot to let you play with her. You know what would be fun? Giving her what she deserves."

"I-I don't know, big sis ( that's what I called her because she was like a big sis to me). Why should I? That's not nice."

"Of course it's not nice. That's the entire point! The point is to scare her off so she won't bother you anymore. Hey, how about trading your pink balloon with her for her blue balloon?"

"What? That doesn't make sense big sis. Pink is my favorite color, and that's more nice than mean."

"Ugh- it's impossible to explain to littles, listen, do exactly what I say. When she gives you the balloon, lean over and bite her ear. Go ahead, do it before anyone sees!"

"No- I can't! It's wrong! Big sis, stop being mean!"

"IF YOU WON'T DO IT, I WILL!"

Then I remember being sucked outside my body and looking at my alter take control. She did exactly as she told me
to do. I hear her sometimes now but it's only when I'm in danger- or at least her idea of danger. She took over me when this girl
slapped me in the face for no reason back in September. She appears often in my dreams as a protector alter.

Then I have a kind one, who I think took control of my body when I was 3-7 ( I was going through some deep emotional trauma/ stress, but it wasnt too detailed, too much for a 3-6 year old to handle, thats for sure.) I can remember crying all by myself and we just talked like,

"Hey, why are you crying?"

"Because- because.. no one likes me.. because my eye is broken "

"Sweet heart, everything about you is beautiful. Especially that eye of yours, its special! They don't want to play with you because they're jealous that your eye is so awesome, while they just have normal and boring eyes."

"Oh.. but I still don't have anyone to talk to- except you. I wish I could just go away from this. I don't want this anymore."

Then she told me everything was going to be alright and I have suffered enough. I then "fell asleep" and eventually "woke up" when we moved when I was 7. Never talked to her since, except I saw her in a few dreams once. She was really nice. I'm a little sad that I really can't communicate with them. Does anyone know how I can talk to them besides journaling ( I don't lose time- they never take control except in dire situations.) They also have no names .-.! How did you meet your alters? If it's through meditation, what type of meditation and how long did you do it for?

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by GunterWunter345

As far as I know, I have one- maybe two or
more alters. The first alter,she's all out for revenge and stuff, having my earliest recollection of her being when I was two. - could be triggerin-I was beat up a lot by my dad and my so called friends at that age. There was a mentally ill girl who would beat me up for no reason. I think my alter got tired of hearing me cry all the time, so she started talking to me. Funny thing is, when I told my mom what I remembered from what happened years later, she accused me of making it up, but it happened. Here's what she said, along how I replied:

"Ugh. Not her again. She hurts you all the time! Why do you even go around her? I can't believe that your mom is enough of an idiot to let you play with her. You know what would be fun? Giving her what she deserves."

"I-I don't know, big sis ( that's what I called her because she was like a big sis to me). Why should I? That's not nice."

"Of course it's not nice. That's the entire point! The point is to scare her off so she won't bother you anymore. Hey, how about trading your pink balloon with her for her blue balloon?"

"What? That doesn't make sense big sis. Pink is my favorite color, and that's more nice than mean."

"Ugh- it's impossible to explain to littles, listen, do exactly what I say. When she gives you the balloon, lean over and bite her ear. Go ahead, do it before anyone sees!"

"No- I can't! It's wrong! Big sis, stop being mean!"

"IF YOU WON'T DO IT, I WILL!"

Then I remember being sucked outside my body and looking at my alter take control. She did exactly as she told me
to do. I hear her sometimes now but it's only when I'm in danger- or at least her idea of danger. She took over me when this girl
slapped me in the face for no reason back in September. She appears often in my dreams as a protector alter.

Then I have a kind one, who I think took control of my body when I was 3-7 ( I was going through some deep emotional trauma/ stress, but it wasnt too detailed, too much for a 3-6 year old to handle, thats for sure.) I can remember crying all by myself and we just talked like,

"Hey, why are you crying?"

"Because- because.. no one likes me.. because my eye is broken "

"Sweet heart, everything about you is beautiful. Especially that eye of yours, its special! They don't want to play with you because they're jealous that your eye is so awesome, while they just have normal and boring eyes."

"Oh.. but I still don't have anyone to talk to- except you. I wish I could just go away from this. I don't want this anymore."

Then she told me everything was going to be alright and I have suffered enough. I then "fell asleep" and eventually "woke up" when we moved when I was 7. Never talked to her since, except I saw her in a few dreams once. She was really nice. I'm a little sad that I really can't communicate with them. Does anyone know how I can talk to them besides journaling ( I don't lose time- they never take control except in dire situations.) They also have no names .-.! How did you meet your alters? If it's through meditation, what type of meditation and how long did you do it for?

there was only one time in which I was able to do what you stated of "looking at my alter taking control" it was during a medication induced psychotic event, basically a delusional thought coupled with a hallucination of seeing an alter, once my medications were adjusted/changed I could no longer "see" the alter.. I knew these hallucinatory/delusional/psychotic induced alters were there when I kept hearing some very derogatory comments about me and my friends and a suicide attempt was made.

I did have a type of alters called introjects (Here in NY these type of alters are different then having DID type alters) my introject alters were very abusive to me and others, telling me to do horribly mean things to myself and others, in short they were personalities that took on the role of my abusers. I knew these introjects were there when I was a child and trying to tell my therapist what had happened to me but every time I tried to say anything I would get hurt.

I also had some very elaborate imaginary friends who took on sisterly brotherly roles sometimes being very nice and sometimes being very mean depending upon what I needed at that moment.

my actual DID type alters I did not know they were there until after I was diagnosed.. I heard voices and a ringing in my head but I thought everyone had this. The first time I put the voices together with an alter was when I was sitting in a college art class and I had done some painting. I had the urge to write the name Sunny up in the upper right hand corner, while at the same time I heard the words "thats me" I looked closer at the painting and realized I didnt remember painting a few of the objects in the painting.

[GunterWunter345]

Wow. They won't tell me anything About them, its kind of like a uncontrollable voice in my head. At first I just thought it was my inner voice,until I heard the voice getting louder, and I heard them fight with each other lol. Its weird. Im thinking about trying to meet them but I cant talk to them. Its like theyre blocked off lol.

Most of us already knew each other from when we were little.
Not the host, cuz she was clueless (& still is)
Over time we have caught others running around inside, mostly hiding, but get spotted.