Been doing some reading about Covert Abuse. Speaking on my own behalf as a victim of childhood abuse, I found it eye opening to me that some of the following were considered abuse.

There are a million ways to abuse. To love too much is to abuse. It is tantamount to treating someone as an extension, an object, or an instrument of gratification. To be over-protective, not to respect privacy, to be brutally honest with a sadistic sense of humor, or consistently tactless - is to abuse.

http://healthyplace.com/Communities/...ism/abuse.html

And then when I read this, I shuddered because I know these people.

Imagine - if you can - not having a conscience, none at all, no feelings of guilt or remorse no matter what you do, no limiting sense of concern for the well-being of strangers, friends, or even family members. Imagine no struggles with shame, not a single one in your whole life, no matter what kind of selfish, lazy, harmful, or immoral action you had taken.

http://www.cassiopaea.com/cassiopaea/psychopath.htm

I find it helpful to read. Knowledge is power.

[Mahali]

I know some of these people also, unfortunately.

It is good to know who these people are IMO because many can present as helpfull and concerned. People need to be able to recognize them. Their goal is to hurt. I think at times these people may not even know they are abusers.

Good links, thanks Petunia.

[woundedhearts]

Thanks for sharing. I have found a few interesting things myself lately and shared to others about similar stuff.

[(JD)]

[SeptemberMorn]

(shudders!!!) I know both kinds of people mentioned! I run like hell in the opposite direction whenever I can! YEEEECH!

Thanks for sharing that, Petunia!

So good to have you back.

[January]

My father was the first kind. The person who hurt me in January is the second kind. He called today from a number that I didn't know he would use. To say that I've been freaked and sick all day is an understatement.

Jan

[(JD)]

(((((Jan))))

[bipolar_bear]

(((((((((((((((((((Jan)))))))))))))))))))))

[nothemama8]

January, take your wall hanging and (I know this may sound strange but) sit it on a chair or floor, sit on it , close your eyes, and think peaceful thoughts, my arms are circling around you comforting you, breathe deep, relax, do this and it might help
Love
Angie

[hillbunnyb]

whoooo boy, i know too many people who fit both descriptions. unfortunately they tend to be in power over positions..... parents, landlords, etc phooey make me pull the covers up over my head most of the time..... my Vinny, unfortunately, is not on call. (He'd whup 'em for us)

[Evangelista]

Eva

[January]

(((((((((((((((( Friends )))))))))))))))))

Thank you. Thank you so much. All of you have good ideas. Life is terrifying sometimes...

Jan

[Mahali]

(((((((hugs))))))

[LMo]

Angie, that was really sweet....
Jan, my mushy hug-thoughts to you...

[LILITH]

Thank you Petunia. That was very interesting reading. I too am a survivor of childhood abuse, young adult abuse, then abuse as an adult. I went to work as a Sex*al Abuse Counselor, and Domestic Violence Counselor/Advocate. The abusers almost use a hypnotic state for them to do their abuse.