[KeenQueen]

Hi, I'm new and decided this should be the first place I post.

I have a few questions....
First, when did you become diagnosed?
Second, what does its feel like when it first happens? Is it a totally different person coming out and you're aware but they're in control of everything like your just in your body watching it do its thing?

I ask because I'm having serious issues and am not sure if im just manic or crazy or what's going on. I thought maybe if I heard how you felt I could compare and see if it's the same.

Thanks

[Kiya]

hi - welcome.
it's different for everyone. why don't you tell us a little about yourself and we can compare notes

[Claritytoo]

I think it might be good to read about DID and talk to a therapist if you think you may be DID

Dissociative Identity Disorder Symptoms | Psych Central

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by KeenQueen

Hi, I'm new and decided this should be the first place I post.

I have a few questions....
First, when did you become diagnosed?
Second, what does its feel like when it first happens? Is it a totally different person coming out and you're aware but they're in control of everything like your just in your body watching it do its thing?

I ask because I'm having serious issues and am not sure if im just manic or crazy or what's going on. I thought maybe if I heard how you felt I could compare and see if it's the same.

Thanks

best not to try and compare yourself to others. how a person dissociates, why and how it affects them is different for everyone.

example

for some people its feeling numb
for some people its feeling spaced out
for some people its feeling disconnected
for some people its watching
for some people its none of the above
for some people its all or some of the above.

there is also other accompanying symptoms that each person has depending upon what their own life circumstances, other mental and physical health issues, culture......

no not all dissociative problems involve having alters take control. theres only two dissociative disorders that involve this, the rest do not have alters taking control. the first one is DID and the second is OSDD (other Specified Dissociative Disorder) the difference in the two is that with DID theres a huge amount of symptoms and the second has less then marked symptoms meaning very little memory loss and other issues but still have alters. the rest of the dissociative disorders do not have alters taking control.

heres where you can read about them ...
http://forums.psychcentral.com/disso...s-dsm-5-a.html

my suggestion since there are many different mental disorders that share the same symptoms as having dissociative problems and seeming to have alters, if you think you may have this problem contact a treatment provider (ie a medical doctor, therapist, psychiatrist, psychologist) they can tell you how to go about getting the correct diagnosis and treatment.

as for your question of what it feels like the first time...that depends on what mental disorder you have...for example with DID the first time it happens feels exactly what it is...a child under the age of 5 (according to new york statistics) being abused in the most extreme ways. this is what causes the childs mind to create alternate personalities.

[flockpride]

Here's the thing: you might not remember "the first time" since amnesia among parts happens. The first time you are aware of a switch could be dramatic or subtle. This budding awareness can be disturbing and reassuring, validating. But, it is subjective and different for everyone.

[KeenQueen]

Okay so here is what I've been experiencing, I scream at people and get so angry at them and I know I'm being a complete ***** for no reason and can't seem to stop myself. Then it's like I want to talk to them like nothing happened. Sometimes I forget saying things people say I have said if that makes sense. It's almost like personality switching I go from nice and calm to completely crazy. I just can't seem to stop myself while I'm doing it.

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[KeenQueen]

It's like I can't control my brain.

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Hi KeenQueen! Are you diagnosed with any disorders? I do bipolar switching and on the extreme end it sounds just like what you described, not saying that's it or anything.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by KeenQueen

It's like I can't control my brain.

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Im sorry but we can not diagnose what this problem is with in you. I see by your other posts you have bipolar disorder...I have bipolar disorder too.

bipolar does come with mood switches like yelling at people and then choosing to act as if nothing happened. with DID there is no .....choosing...

one thing you need to know about having dissociative type alters. this isnt something that comes on a person suddenly one day of getting angry and then choosing to pretend you didnt get so angry.

my suggestion is if this continues to bother you contact your treatment providers. they will explain to you why you have been diagnosed with bipolar and not DID, and they can also order a battery of physical and mental evaluations for diagnosing, anything that carries the symptom of getting angry at people suddenly. they can even adjust any bipolar medications you are on (or prescribe some if you are not on any) so that if this turns out to be a medication problem or bipolar problem it wont keep happening for you.

[KeenQueen]

Panic disorder is the only thing I've been diagnosed with a friend suggested I look at DID and talk to people diagnosed with it, I see my therapist on the 12th for the first time.

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[Claritytoo]

Originally Posted by KeenQueen

Panic disorder is the only thing I've been diagnosed with a friend suggested I look at DID and talk to people diagnosed with it, I see my therapist on the 12th for the first time.

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Maybe do as much reading about PTSD and DID, than discuss this with your therapist. It is good that you are open to finding a diagnosis that fits your experiences. It could be anything at this point. Narrowing it down with you t is the best way.

[flockpride]

KeenQueen,
It could be helpful to talk to people with DID if you are diagnosed, but short of that it's all apples and oranges. And even among people with DID it's apples and oranges. Some of the phenomena can be very disconcerting. Like being told things you have said and done recently and having no memory of it. Although, I have been told recently that this happened constantly with me as a child. Now that makes sense. In any case, I hope you have found a good match in this therapist you'll be seeing. Rapport is super important in that relationship. Hope this helps.

[Ocean5]

I think what's important is you're starting to see a therapist, and be grateful to you're friend willing to bring up topic.

Flockpride: "Like being told things you have said and done recently and having no memory of it. Although, I have been told recently that this happened constantly with me as a child. Now that makes sense."

Can relate. Recently questioned someone I trust about my past, but no longer in my life. They said sometimes even in "same day" my views of something would change to total opposite. And sometimes my emotional responses didn't match situation at all. It worried and deeply concerned this person...

I've also come home to find things out of place, but nothing missing. I even left money out, and set-up a motion sensing web camera software to record my apartment... Yet nothing. Now this makes more sense.