I was just reading about when a person reaches 40 years old or so that their system tends to settle down and not be that big of a deal.

Mine is still haywire like. Can anyone confirm this to be true?

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

I was just reading about when a person reaches 40 years old or so that their system tends to settle down and not be that big of a deal.

Mine is still haywire like. Can anyone confirm this to be true?

short version for women 40 and above is usually the pre menopausal \ menopause post menopause stages of life. at this stage of life women are usually more focused on whats going on in their physical body changes.. monthly problems, hot flashes, mood swings. because all their energy is being focused towards taking care of the physical aspects of their life other problems dont seem as important or as bad..less triggering means less dissociating...

example someone I know who went through this stage of life would have a mood swing related to menopause if someone said something they did not like. this mood swing would be so high that they would border on violence with who ever they were talking with. they would double up their fists ready for a fight, emotions at its highest.

after menopause having a disagreement with someone they were talking too would not seem as triggering to them because of the high level of rage they previously had to deal with while going through menopause. because they were less triggered, they were able to discuss the problem and work it out rather than dissociating.

heres an experiment.... buy a lemon or lime or some food item you find bitter, sour, repulsive. now ever time take a taste of that food item. eventually that item wont taste so bitter, sour, repulsive to you because you have learned how to handle it.

thats what happens with people as they age, they over their life time they learn how to handle their problems so that those problems are no longer triggering to them. the menopausal years are a great teacher for women on how to handle the hard stuff. less triggering means less dissociating.

men also go through their bracket of life where they have to go through life changing situations as they age that teaches them how to handle the hard stuff. some the male version of menopause. others call it mid life crisis.

System:

We were settled in our ways, so to speak....but every few years someone gets out and stirs the pot....hard- and here we go again. Life changing moments.

I know that switching was very low and anonymous....but somebody had to get treated for depression which opened up the flood gates to reconfronting MI. From depression to BD to DID/OSDD. ****.

Everything changes in these life altering moments and now we are back to where we began like in the earlier adult years- trying to take a foothold in ourselves- a rebranding of sorts.

We tried to live the simple life by choice, mindless of self in denial, a topper to ease the mental agony. Being simple meant less options which meant less switching. Living like a hermit on a hill in the woods, away from the public, coming down and going out for basic supplies and lots of beer to stay numb and forget. This lasted for years- a good run by our standards. But....

One can only top things off for so long till the top blows and things boil over.

No going back, once again. We are looking for "the new you"- what is this new life's flavor? Let's try something with a little more urban and color flare, but not so over the top noticeable but much free'er than the last. These co-conscience collaborations are so much fun, it's like building a character (image and life theme) using our traits and skills as color (deciding who is going to be the new mains). A work in progress!

This is like the 10th or more life changer.

This is why it's news for us.

I'm done here....I'm on the out.

Susan:

Yes, I thought all systems were and is in turmoil as it goes. Oh well, never normal.... Lol

[Shaly78]

The older the body is, is what I read, but an age wasn't discussed in the article/website...

[Susan27]

hi. I'm new back here. and I'm 48. I thought all had settled down. I wasn't dissociating much anymore...or so I thought. actually, now that it's all ripped up from under me, I think I was settled in a place/plateau for a while and something triggered me and now I'm all over the place wondering who I am and how I lost my footing on reality, or something like that. so no, I think as we get older and calmer we might get periods of time where things settle for a while but even this perimenopause stuff can stir the pot up until things come boiling over ... again. like my 5th period of shattering and then needing to start building the pieces back together again. this is getting old and I'm getting tired and my adrenals aren't holding the fear as well anymore. I feel like I'm burning out here.