It seems that when we expose our true nature to the world and people, it seems that Others are more prone to present freely. Like at home, the fems have taken over because they were outed a year ago. Now they are popping in at work and becoming a nuisance. I work construction in a tight knit enviroment and people are talking. I've quit a many good jobs because of this thing.

Sorry about the complaining, but I thought if someone understood and had to deal with it....

Talking to them does no good. I think they have their own agenda....like system wide domination. I just want to work unbothered and left alone.

-Carpenter

[Skeezyks]

Hello AlwaysChanging2: The Skeezyks always kept his gender dysphoria deeply hidden. A few years ago, long after he was no longer working, he poked his head out of the closet & waved the transgender flag a few times. No one wanted to know anything about it. So he just crept back into the closet & closed the door again. It's dark... but it's familiar...

[Shaly78]

Not alone, quit, got sick, fired. Life long thing it has gotten better for us so I'm optimistic it can for others.

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

Like at home, the fems have taken over because they were outed a year ago. Now they are popping in at work and becoming a nuisance. I work construction.
-Carpenter

Sorry you're dealing with this. But its nice to read other people going through the same kinda thing as me.

When I first found out about the younger ones, they kept popping up at work- a new and much needed job. In the end we had a group chat. Agreed that a major goal of ours is to manage to stay in my house, and in order to do that I not only need this job - I need a better paid job. With that as an agreed goal, the next obvious step was to agree that the job is the most important thing right now, and that if the workers are left alone to do their thing at work, the Others who hold back during the day can do whatever the hell they like in the evening and at weekends. The repercussions are interesting - Im glad i live alone! But work has improved 100%, so worth it.

My mate has a managerial role in a construction company during the day. By night he's a pretty little fairy gimp to his dominatrix wife. Theres been loads of times he's turned up to his mightily testosteroney work covered in glitter. He always just laughs it off, telling the lads 'its his wife' body glitter' with a wink. He gets ribbed a bit, but is still highly respected!

Can you use humour to turn your colleagues around? If your Others won't make a deal, then you need to accept that they are going to pop up at work - and so finding a way turn this to your advantage could help. I tend to do a two pronged attack:

1) Humour - when something embarrassing happens to me, I try and use humour to put any witnesses at ease. Self deprecation works a treat, along with complete openess about whatever just happened. Sometimes it can be as easy as just rolling my eyes and saying "omg, Im such a freak" or "well that was interesting" and laughing. Just something that allows them to relax in my company, ask any questions they have, and carry on with what they were doing. Make it easy for them to accept you as you are.

2) Be the best. You've already said several times you are good at your job... Well be the best. That way, your quirks become an acceptable part of the you that is necessary for the businesses ongoing success. Don't make it a competition with your colleagues. Just be so valuable to the company and to your colleagues, that your quirks are accepted.

[Luce]

Hmm, I agree, it is good to be able to put boundaries in around work whenever possible. Apart from the times we're a big old triggery mess we have always managed to do reasonably well not having alts at work inappropriately. It wasn't something we had to work on, thankfully, it was just how it was / is. (That is, apart from when we are a big triggery mess.)
I like what CassyO said - if you can see if you can get an agreement with the fems to keep it to a minimum at work and take time for their own selves afterwards.
I sure know how there is never enough time in the day for everyone, though.

Well, I do admit that we are more free-er once the cats out of the bag, but like Luce says: "...we are a big triggery mess."

Besides, whose to say that we aren't valid? It's our turn now boy.

[Luce]

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

Well, I do admit that we are more free-er once the cats out of the bag, but like Luce says: "...we are a big triggery mess."

Besides, whose to say that we aren't valid? It's our turn now boy.

Oh yes, everyone is definitely valid. But, do you *really* want to do the building type stuff? If you do (which is fine!) maybe you could figure out with others in there some particular jobs you could take care of at work, or something like that. You know, turn taking, sharing the load, forging agreements amongst your selves etc...

Originally Posted by Luce

Oh yes, everyone is definitely valid. But, do you *really* want to do the building type stuff? If you do (which is fine!) maybe you could figure out with others in there some particular jobs you could take care of at work, or something like that. You know, turn taking, sharing the load, forging agreements amongst your selves etc...

Well.....I think the worst of all this is the embarrassment factor. To come to and be standing in line ..... Lol