[Rive1976]

My gut is telling me I dont have DID again. When I mention it to my psychologist she says I am in denial.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Dnester

My gut is telling me I dont have DID again. When I mention it to my psychologist she says I am in denial.

when I get like this I put the diagnosis stuff to the side and go on with life as if I dont have that diagnosis name.

let me show you what I mean...

when I have a cold do I need a doctor to tell me I have a cold do I need to think I have a cold. no naming it doesnt change the fact that I need to get plenty of fluids and rest.

"DID" is just a name, a label, three letters on paper.

does it change the fact that when I heard voices I needed to write them down like my treatment providers asked me to? no.

does it change the fact that I feel spaced out... no.

now the other side... not having DID...

Did not calling myself DID change the fact that I heard voices and when I did I needed to follow my treatment providers wanting me to write them down... no

Did not calling myself DID change the fact that I felt spaced out...no..

see what I mean...

so what you dont feel like you have DID, it doesnt change anything you still have your problems and need to follow your treatment providers whether or not its named some thing.

So what your treatment provider calls it DID, the fact that she calls it that doesnt change any of your problems.

Dnester.... the way I see it... a person can stay stuck going round and round and round, and getting no where or they can decide its time to get out of the round about and work on their problems...

you have been in this unending loop now for quite sometime....only you can decide when enough is enough and either accept your diagnosis or not.

we cant tell you what to do. its all in your hands.

for me when I get in an unending loop like this I take the loop and like a brick, I drop it and go on with my life not focusing on diagnosis names, doing what I need to do to feel better, instead of constantly feeding the same problem and going through the same stress over and over again.

you have this huge brick in your hands and when it gets too heavy its ok to just go ahead and drop it. it will still be there later on down the road when you want that diagnosis.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Dnester

My gut is telling me I dont have DID again. When I mention it to my psychologist she says I am in denial.

heres another thought.. in another thread you said your treatment provider is not putting DID on your insurance paperwork, that she is calling it an adjustment disorder. so how about just calling it an adjustment disorder instead of DID. either way it doesnt change whats what inside you.

[Betty_Banana]

Originally Posted by Dnester

My gut is telling me I dont have DID again. When I mention it to my psychologist she says I am in denial.

I don't know if you really have DID or not buy what I do know is denial is fairly common with DID

I went through times where I didn't think I had it at all and would apologize to my therapist for faking it.And then I would apologize for not knowing why I was faking or where any of it was even coming from.Sometimes those inside would tell him they didn't have it either and would apologize.I once told him I didn't believe I had it at all but maybe one inside did.

Lol

I know it's not funny but I do understand the back and forth with the denial.

[FearLess47]

Me too, you guys.

[FearLess47]

Elaboration: I am all over the place with acceptance and denial. I might even say there are blaring blinking neon signs all around me, and yet I still either don't want to see them, see them and pretend I don't...or tell myself I am imagining things.

Dnester...I know you're having a lot of confusion and anxiety about what to call yourself and which box you fit into...I think perhaps that answer will reveal itself with time, patience, openness and the willingness to not know for a while.

I, like you, am doing my best to take it one moment at a time and not to use such black and white thinking. Please breathe....and know that in time, this stuff will sort itself out.


FearLess47